Stars in her Eyes
by DeathToBeReborn
Summary: Jennifer March, 'A' list film star. Finally rids herself of the thorn in her side. Only to stumble over someone she didn't even knew existed, Marcus Perdy. The lead singer of the most popular band of the time attends a T.V. chat show that will change his path in life forever. Stars in her eyes is a story of love, pain and money. Happy endings only happen in films, don't they?
1. Chapter 1 - Vegas Or Bust

**Chapter 1 -Vegas**

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><p>"But you slept with her Dwain!" I boomed as his eyes begged me for my forgiveness. They pleaded for me to take him back.<p>

He cautiously took another step closer, now only a few feet away. "Selina, please? Please Baby; I was drunk, I didn't know..." I cut him off mid snivel "ENOUGH! I've heard enough Dwain, Just GO!" I was done, and now he knew it too. I had to remain strong, composed. I couldn't let him see he'd plunged his hand deep into my chest and ripped out my heart, leaving only a shell to pick up the pieces.

Watching him reluctantly leave I took a deep draw on my cigarette, tilted my head up a slight angle and blew the white fumes free. He had gone.

"CUT! Brian Stanley, my director yelled. "Beautiful Jen! Best take yet! O.K! We move to scene 112 after Lunch! 40 minutes people!"

"Thank God! I'm starving!" My stomach agreed with me, expelling a long low rumble.

We were two months into filming my latest movie 'Vegas or Bust'. I played Selina Prouse a 'rich bitch' who won a fortune in Las Vegas, Benjamin Symmonds played my serial cheat husband Dwain Prouse. He'd slept with one pretty girl too many. Tim Ford, a rather dashing American actor played my young love interest Charles. With money of his own he had no trouble picking or choosing whom he spent it on.

Stubbing out my cigarette, I headed for my trailer. Surely I could find something to eat in there maybe? The hot Florida sun beat down on me as I exited the main studio, making me squint when it hit my eyes. I pulled down the shades from on top my head; this really wasn't the day to be getting a headache. Clearly the low throbbing in my head argued that point.

As I got into the trailer I rifled through my bag, finding the painkillers I always kept on me. Taking a big swig from a water bottle I'd left on the side, I chucked back the two small white pills to the back of my throat and swallowed hard.

There was a soft knock on my trailer door. _Gees, I get no peace!_ I thought to myself. I did this quite often, sometimes it was the only person I had that didn't argue with me. "Yes!" I said irritated. The door opened and my runner Charlie stuck her head round the door. "Would you like me to bring you some lunch Mrs March? Or will you be going to the food hall today?"

"No it's fine Charlie. I'll be right out." Charlene was great, she really looked after me. She always made sure I ate and that I always had water, and on warm days like today, I needed it. "OK." She said disappearing again. Checking my appearance in the mirror, I popped my glasses back on, grabbed my water and headed for lunch.

After lunch I returned to the set, looking over my scripts. I remembered these were the scenes I'd dreaded. I'd done mild sex scenes before, but there was just something about them I couldn't feel comfortable with. I got embarrassed. Especially when the actor I was grinding was as hot as Tim Ford. I don't care what any actor says. Sometimes, if you let your mind wander too far, those noises were usually real ones.

My nerves surfaced as we started to roll, which made us have to do four takes of the same scene before they got the shots they needed. Shaking my head annoyed, I wrapped my gown around me, covering my naked flesh along with my embarrassment. "Sorry Guys!"

Anger soon turned to amusement when Tim told me not to worry; he had my ruby red lipstick smeared all over his face. I couldn't help but snigger. Guessing what my reaction related to, he marched to the nearest mirror in the bedroom set. "You made me look like a clown! Cheers Jen!" He chuckled now too, checking his reflection. "My pleasure." I giggled, thankful that scene was finally done.

"Jen, that's you done for the day." Brian called to me after checking the reel. "See you tomorrow. 6 sharp!"

"Cool!" I replied with a smile. _It would be a Short day for me today. Ideal. _Charlie handed me some more water and said "Your car is in port seven, anything you need before you go?" She was thoughtful. "Um, no I don't think so. Thanks Charlie."

"No problem Mrs March. See you tomorrow!" She smiled sweetly and went off to see to something else.

I made my way back to my trailer to change and pick up my bag, thankfully spotting my own clown mouth in the mirror. I chuckled to myself and scrubbed it off with a wet wipe. Finding my car, my driver greeted me and we set off for my hotel. I couldn't wait to step into my nice cool shower. Today had been a hot one. Thankfully the car had air-con. With a sigh of relief I pulled my phone from my bag. Greg had ringed six times.

Greg March was my husband of seven years. Or that's what the piece of paper said anyway. He was a lawyer for the stars, which is how we met. I'd appointed him to represent me on my case against a certain big tabloid newspaper who had falsely accused me of a drug binge at a huge party I'd attended. We'd won our case and he'd won my heart. Gradually over the years our work took all of our time to separate places and we grew apart. Our marriage was mostly now run over the phone, In between shoots and meetings. The times we did get together we either argued or spent hours talking about how we had grown apart. Our marriage wasn't a marriage. It was a joke!

Gone were the days where we snuggled together and made love in front of our fire, in one of our three houses. We owned one in New York, one in Paris and one in London. London was where I was born and grew up. I schooled there and attended Tracing Academy for Fine Arts when I left college, where I sailed through and got my diploma.

I got into the business by getting a runner job. Just like Charlie, but on a TV chat show instead of a film set. That was also where I met my best friend Tasha Barrett. I got spotted by Trent James, who went on to become my manager. He'd been on the show with one of his clients and said I had the face for film. Of course I disagreed, but he said he saw something in me that I didn't. Which I later started to take seriously when he got me my first small film parts as extras.

11 years on, he was still by my side. He relocated to New York when he introduced me to the U.S film industry, taking a huge leap from his small business he ran in London. He upped sticks and moved his whole life there. Positive he could make it work. I owed a lot to Trent. I would not be where I was today if it hadn't been for him. He now lived in Florida with his wife and 2 children. Secretly I admired him. He had it all.

.

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><p><strong>AN: Well Here we go. A new story, a new start and a new Beta.**

**This is a story that's been in my head for a while. It's read from the perspective of a female movie star. I hope you like it. Look forward to some reviews.**

**My Beta on this one is my good friend TwihardTillIDie. Thank you for your help. I hope to return the favour real soon.  
><strong>

**Enjoy People xx**

**DeathToBeReborn. **


	2. Chapter 2 - Friends

**Chapter 2 - Friends**

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><p><em>What did Greg want now? He'd better not be cancelling our date, again! I had it all planned out!<em>

Sitting back comfortably in my leather bound seat I reluctantly hit re-dial. Hoping he would prove me wrong.

"Greg?" I swiped the back of my fist across my damp forehead, wiping away the beads of sweat that had gathered there. "Jen! Look, listen..." This is how all Greg's conversations started recently, and quite frankly I was getting fed up of it. I knew exactly where this one was headed too. "...this case is a fucking nightmare." He continued. "I'm going to be stuck here for a few more days. Sorry Darlin'."

"What? You promised you'd make it back today. I was going to make a picnic!" In a totally believable voice he said "I'm sorry Jennifer, maybe next week? I'll make it up to you I promise!" He always said that too, and I hated it when he called me Jennifer! That was what my mother called me when I was a kid and I'd been bad. He knew that and he still called me it. "I haven't seen you for two weeks Greg. Please? Can't they wait?" I wasn't hopeful, but I had to try. "Sorry Darlin'. Oh, hang on Jen." I heard him mumbling to someone, muffled by his hand over the mouth piece. He returned to our call after the brief conflab. "Look I have to go. Something's come up. I'm sorry; I'll phone you tomorrow, OK?"

"Do I have any choice?" I retorted sulking. He didn't answer, he'd already hung up. There was no; 'How was your day Darling?' No, 'How's the movie going?' Nothing. Our conversations were just as empty as our marriage.

.

We pulled into the hotel car park and I thanked my driver before my door opened. Security was manning the steps and 20 or so keen fans were being held behind a barrier. On a normal day, I'd be more than happy to pose for pictures and say 'Hi' but today, I just didn't feel in the mood. Today, regardless of my feelings I knew I had to face the crowd. Putting on my best smile, I stepped out the car.

"Quick as you can please Mrs March!" The security chap said. The trouble with me was I never wanted to let my public down. Lord knows how long they had been stood there. Some had probably been there all day. Five minutes of my time was nothing. I owed them.

I waved and smiled and said 'Hi' as I moved along the barrier. I signed the books that were shoved into my face before crossing over the other side. I did the same there until I finally went up the steps. I turned, waved and went inside. Feeling the immediate change in temperature on my face as the air-conditioning hit me, I sighed. "Phew, it's a hot one today."

"Afternoon Mrs March." The receptionist said politely smiling. "Afternoon Polly." Sad wasn't it? I knew all their names now. Security saw me to my door, once inside I threw down my bag and automatically turned on the TV for background noise. It made me feel less lonely, these days. Heading to the bedroom, I stripped off and padded to the shower room; eager to wash all my cares as well as the smell of Tim's aftershave, away. Standing under the hot water stream, I felt myself relax and all my pent up aggression and annoyance disappeared down the plughole with the soapy water.  
>When I was done I stepped out, wrapped up my hair and folded a huge towel tightly around my body. These hotel towels were lovely.<p>

_I must get some for home._

Tucking in the end I walked back out to the lounge. I fished a cigarette out of my bag and lit it. Checking my phone whilst I was there, I saw a two missed calls. One from Trent and one was from Tasha. Without hesitation I chose Tasha over Trent and tapped her name, lifting the phone to my ear I inhaled a draw.

"Hey Babes!" She greeted me as she always did.  
>"Hey Hunny, you OK?" I exhaled a cloud of white smoke.<br>"Yeah, I just rang to see how things went today?" _Hah! Even she remembered!_  
>"At least one person asked that today!" I huffed.<br>"Oh?" She sounded puzzled.  
>"Ignore me. Today was awful; I messed up the main scene four times!" I drew in again on my ciggie, and then blew it free.<br>"Want to talk about it?" This is the conversation I should be having with Greg right now, not a friend, miles away in London.  
>"Man! I kept fucking it up! I hate sex scenes! I go to pot!"<br>"God, Jen you are so lucky. What's Tim like? Tell me more!" Her giggle always made me smile.  
>"Well, his body is actually more amazing than his face. But, it's actually harder to do than it sounds. You are surrounded by people with a cameraman looking at the crack of your arse. It feels wrong. Pornographic!" I drew on my cigarette again.<br>"Wow! What I'd give to make a porno with Tim fucking Ford!" She chuckled.  
>After exhaling I replied "Well the film business has its perks!"<br>"Have you seen Greg?" The sheer mention of his name made me anxious.  
>"What do you think!?" I was swiftly back in my bad mood.<br>"Man he's a dick! I really don't know why you're with him Jen, he doesn't make any effort!" _She hit the nail on the head there!_

Tasha was never backwards about coming forwards when it came to her opinion on Greg. I knew she hated him for the way he treated me.

"His present case is a nasty one apparently." Why on earth I was covering for him I didn't know. "I was going to make a picnic for today, but he called to say he couldn't make it." _Maybe another draw on this cigarette would numb this pang in my heart._

"He's an idiot! I'm sorry Hunny. You know what I think, he needs ditching Babes. He's a self-centred asshole!"  
>"I know. It's so hard though, I always think he will change. But I guess I'm just kidding myself...anyway, enough about him. How are you?"<br>"Ah you know. Same shit, different day. Work is work!" _Yep, I know that feeling._

"Sam OK?" She'd been with Sam for nearly a year now, they were still most definitely in honeymoon mode.  
>"Oh yeah. I forgot to say, he took me to the X Factor final on Sunday!" She sounded happy.<br>"Oh Wow! Any good?"

X Factor was a music talent show, everyone wanted to be the next big shot. They sang, well some did; some just wailed, and the winner would get a record contract.  
>"Wasn't bad." She replied matter-of-factly. "Not as good as when Gary Barlow was on it though!" <em>Mmm Gary Barlow!<em>  
>"I heard he was back on tour!" I stubbed out my butt, now dead.<br>"Yeah, may see if Sam will take me..." She started sounding distracted.  
>"You OK? You sound busy" The time difference would mean she was at work still.<br>"Yeah, kind of. Look I got to go. Sorry Babes." she apologized.  
>"That's cool. Catch you Friday?" She rang twice a week, usually Mondays and Fridays.<br>"Yes. I'll ring Friday around four?" Least I knew when she said she'd ring, she did. _Why couldn't husbands be like friends?_ _Trueful and Loyal._  
>"Sure Hunny. Speak to you then, bye!"<br>"Bye Hun!"  
>Ending the call with a smile, I eyed the missed call from Trent I thought. <em>I'll ring him later.<em> I wasn't in the mood now.

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><p><strong>AN:** **Welcome back to chapter 2 then. What are your thoughts? Friends are great aren't they? *looks for the nods***

**Big sparkly thanks to twihard till I die for being there when I need an ego boost and being a great Beta. I look forward to seeing your work. ;o)**

**Everyone ready for chapter 3? Scream if you wanna go faster! **

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	3. Chapter 3 - Thorns

**Chapter 3 - Thorns  
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><p>Filming at Triad Productions went well the next day. I was virtually done with my scenes now, and I could see the end of the tunnel. We'd been filming for 4 months. Living from a hotel wasn't my ideal Hollywood life, I hated it. But living in New York made it impossible to commute from home, so I had little choice. It was a plush hotel and I really couldn't complain on the service I received. But it wasn't anywhere near being at home.<p>

Trent paid me a visit while I was on set with information about a new role he thought I'd be interested in. "It's a Cop movie, you'd star alongside Michael Brandon." He explained wiggling his eyebrows.

Michael Brandon was yet another hot 'A' list actor. I'd seen a film of his before and getting this role would be a big move for me.

"Wow! Yeah, it sounds great. Send me the screenplay and I'll have a look at it and let you know." _Michael Brandon huh? _

"Jen? Forgive me for asking, but are you OK? You seem preoccupied!" He knew me well after all this time, Shit! I saw more of him then my own husband nowadays. "Oh, don't you start Trent! I had Tash on my case last night."  
>"I'm just worried, you don't seem your cheery self at all recently, that's all."<br>"I'm O.K" I lied trying to get him off my back. "Jen I know you, and I don't believe you."  
>"It's Greg! He's too busy to see me again, he ditched our picnic yesterday, cos he was too wrapped up in his recent case. He's promised to ring tonight. I don't hold out much hope though."<br>"God that man! They sure broke his mold when they made him huh?" Trent shared Tash's views on my husband. You think I would take heed huh?  
>"Well I hope he proves us all wrong Jen, I really do. If this is effecting your mood, then the minute it starts effecting your career. Steps need to be taken." He was right, I know he was. <em>Could I go through with ditching Greg? <em>"He's promised." I said sadly.

"I hope so, for his sake! He's pushing his luck this time!" Trent spat bitterly.  
>"What? What do you mean, this time?" <em>Huh?<em> I didn't understand.  
>"Nothing! He's just.." <em>Had he said something he shouldn't have?<em>  
>"Trent!" I needed to know.<br>"It's not my business Jen. I shouldn't have said anything" _Too late! You did!_  
>"I want to know Trent!"<br>"It's nothing." He tried to backtrack.  
>"TRENT! Tell me damn it!" I still needed to know, so i could decide if it was nothing.<br>"Look, it's..it's just gossip." He laughed half-heartedly.  
>"Then I need to know."<br>"O.K. But in private yeah?" I had a real bad feeling about this. Like he knew my reaction would be bad.

"Brian! Jen's going for a quick break!" Trent called to my director.  
>"Oh. O.K! Take 10 while we set up the next scene." Brian held up a thumb to confirm.<p>

We headed silently back to my trailer. I lit up. Knowing I just may need it. Once there Trent started to pace nervously, then took a swig of water from a new bottle on my sideboard. He then returned to biting the skin down the side of his finger. _This wasn't going to be good._

"Ok." He began. I drew in a deep pull to numb the blow. "A Rag reckons they saw him entering a swanky restaurant in the west end, last week."  
>Puzzled I exhaled sharply, and searched his eyes for more information. "And that's bad because?"<br>"He was with a woman Jen." He said quietly looking solemnly into my eyes. _I still didn't get it._  
>"His client <em>is<em> a woman Trent!" He'd already told me he was representing a female client.  
>Looking forlorn he shook his head slowly. "Not this time Jen. I'm sorry!" <em>Not this time? what did he mean?<em>

"I don't understand? What do you mean, not this time?" I knitted my brow, perplexed.

"I mean, they kind of weren't talking business Jen." he narrowed one eye as he spoke, like he was in pain.

It hit me. He was having an affair.

"What? Have, have they got any proof?" My voice was no more than a squeak.  
>He took my now redundant cigarette from my fingers and stubbed it out. "I don't know. But I doubt they would say things like they have, if it was just a hunch. I'm really sorry Jen. I can get people on the case if you require.."<p>

"Get me proof! I want to see it." I interrupted. Talking through my gritted teeth. Slowly gathering all the anger and rage that was rapidly searing through my body. _This was the reason, for all those cancellations._ I needed Proof, and fast.

Shaking his head again he rose to his feet. "Jen, I really don't think..." Not waiting for him to finish, I blindly took out my phone from my bag. Tears clouding my vision. I needed Greg to tell me it was true.

_But he would still deny it right?_

"Jen!" Trent tried to stop me. "You aren't thinking straight."  
>"Do it!" I snapped.<p>

He held out a hand to cover mine holding my phone. "Jen, think! If you ring him now, he will just deny it. He will stop the meetings. The proof will be void. If we can catch him unaware, in the act. We have him by the balls!" I knew what he said make sense. But I was angry right now, and being a male, he bore the brunt.  
>"Fuck you Trent! Fuck You!" My anger made me shake uncontrolably.<br>"Jen please, I know you are angry. You have every right to be. But wait till you have proof!" He took the risk of pulling me into his arms, knowing I wasn't angry at him. I didn't fight back. I had no strength left. Instead, I started to cry.

_Why was I so stupid not to see this?_ _It had been staring me right in the face._

He held me till I was through. Trent was now the only male on this earth I totally trusted.

"I'm sorry." I wiped a crumpled tissue over the wet patch down the front of his shirt.

"No worries. It's what I'm paid for. We will get this sorted, I promise Jen." He looked sincere. I was really lucky to have him in my life.  
>"I just dunno how I'll cope if.." I stared into my lap, pulling apart the soggy white tear catcher.<p>

"Leave it with me, let me deal with this O.K?" And he pulled me into another, more brief hug. "Please?"

I nodded silently with a sniff.

"I'll speak to Brian as well. Say you need some time off. You can't work with this on your mind." With a nudge to my chin he left.

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As soon as I closed my hotel room door my balance went and I fell, broken. Into a crumpled heap onto the beige plush carpet. Trent's words echoed around in my head.

_"They sure broke his mold when they made him huh?"_

".._the minute it starts effecting your career.."_

_"He's pushing his luck this time!"_

_"Not this time Jen. I'm sorry!"_

_..wait till you have proof!"_

_"We have him by the balls!"_

It was my worst nightmare come true.

My husband was screwing another woman.

Once I'd gathered some strength, I crawled to my bed.

Greg did eventually ring, but I ignored his calls. First I had to get proof.

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><p><strong>AN: Welcome Back! So the thorn in her side was her no-good cheating husband! Cue pantomime heckles *Boooooooooo* **

**She's far better off without him huh? **

**Squashy mushy booby bumps to my lovely beta twihard till I die. Loves ya Hunny Bunny. xx**

**What? What's that I hear you scream... More? O.K xx If you insist. ;o)**

**Gimmie some feedback!? I like it x**

**DeathToBeReborn. xx**


	4. Chapter 4 - Valium

**Chapter 4 - Valium  
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><p>Speaking to my so called husband in the following days cut through my soul, like a warm knife through butter. He came up with some more excuses, mostly old ones, but with a few new thrown in for good measure. I knew now my marriage was over. I no longer felt the love I once had. His deceit and lies had put pay to that.<p>

_How had I become immune to it? How did I not notice it in the way he spoke to me? By the tone of his cold voice?_

My trust in men, apart from Trent. Was shattered, just like the fragments of my once warm heart.

Friday, as promised. Tasha rang me. I'd been very withdrawn since I'd seen Trent and it had now been confirmed. Trent called and said had seen the pictures. Greg was indeed pictured all over the blonde. Room service was my new best friend, along with the daily stocked mini bar. I lay on my side curled up on the sofa, hugging a cushion for some comfort.

"Hey Babes!" she said quite jovial, until she didn't get her usual reply. She knew something was wrong straight away. "Jen? What's happened?"

My silence only confirmed her worries even more.

"Jen! Talk to me Babes?"

I thought I'd shed all my tears up to this point, but I was inexplicably wrong. My voice squeaked, course from my devastation. "He's.." I couldn't say it; I couldn't even say the words. He'd stolen my voice as well as my soul.

"Jen? Who? Trent? Come on Babes, take a deep breath. I'm here now." But she wasn't here. She was in London, thousands of miles away from me.

I opened my mouth but still nothing came out but a sob.

"Jen! Fuck!" She was frantic. "Jen answer me Babes, you're scaring me. Who Jen? Greg? What's he done to you?"

Tears streamed down my face as another whimper escaped.

"Jennifer March! Answer me damn it!" She never called me that. I wiped my damp eyes and took a deep breath.

"Greg...he..." I managed two words that time.

"I fucking knew it! What did he do? Did he hurt you? Bastard!" I blew my nose for the umpteenth time that day; it was beginning to get sore now.

"No...He.." _Damn it Jen! Get it out!_

"Please Jen, you're scaring me. Shit! I wish I was there!" I summoned up all my remaining energy I had and said it. "He's...cheating on me Tash." I sounded like a small child, who'd broken their favourite toy.

"HE'S WHAT!" Somehow I thought she'd have guessed. But not even Tash had thought he was capable of stooping that low. Clearly we were both wrong. My lips trembled again and I broke.

"Oh Jen. Baby I'm so sorry! You wait till I get my hands on him! I'm gonna trample on him and rip his dick off with my bare hands! I swear! How did you find out?" I could hear her seething over the line.

"Trent found out and told me. A journalist got pictures. He's seen them, Greg was all over her." Now it was finally off my chest, I felt my composure slowly return.

"Have you spoken to him? Has he even tried to deny it?"

"I've spoke to him, but I couldn't let him know I knew. Trent wanted me to get proof first or he would have just denied it and stopped seeing her. He had to be caught in the act. He was. I can't face him Tasha, I can't."

"I don't fucking blame you! You don't have to say anything. He has just blown the best damn thing in his whole damn life. He doesn't deserve your breath." She was livid. I couldn't help but sob again, my world had come crashing down around me and I was powerless to stop it. Tasha tutted at his stupidity. "Look. I've got some annual leave due, I'm coming over there!"

I couldn't ask her to do that. It cost a fortune to fly here. Just for silly old me. "No, no! Don't! I'll be al..." My best friend wasn't that for nothing, she would be here come hell or high water, picking up the pieces my husband had shattered. "Bullshit!" She interrupted me "You are not going through this alone, not a chance! I'm gonna book a flight right now. I'll let you know when it's for, OK?"

"What am I gonna do Tash? He's my life?"

"No! He's not. Not any more Hunny. He's a scumbag! I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but everything is gonna be OK. I swear to God!" she promised.

"I can't..." My voice trailed off again. She gave me all the strength she could via the phone line. "Jen. Listen, listen to me. I'm coming out there OK? I'm gonna book a flight right now and I'm coming as soon as I can Babes?"

"OK." That's all I had left. I hung up, pulled my knees in tighter, buried my face into the cushion and I cried myself to sleep. Hoping my dreams would relieve some of the hurt.

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Tasha flew out that evening, I didn't know a lot in life, but I knew I picked a goodun when I met Tasha Barrett. She was my rock, my jam on my cream tea. She was my soul mate and now my whole life.

I sent my driver to go pick her up as her flight landed in those early hours. She crashed through my hotel door around 3am. I fell in a crumpled heap straight into her arms. "Shh, shh. It's all right, it's gonna be OK. I'm here now!" We both sank to the floor and she held me. She cried with me and held me and she swore she wouldn't leave till I'd sorted things out. That's all I needed now, my best friend was here.

Trent spoke to my director and managed to get him to grant me some leave from filming. The stories enviably starting circulating and the hounding started. I really didn't know if I had the strength to fight this, but now Tasha was with me. I knew I stood at least a chance.

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As I slept in another Valium induced coma, Tash took a call from Greg. He denied it of course. Tasha made her feelings known and told him in no certain terms he was fucked! He'd messed it up big time, and this time it was for good.

As I opened my eyes, Tasha was still sitting there, as she had promised before I fell asleep. "He called." She said shaking her head. "I told him where to go and to wait to hear from your lawyer." She rubbed my arm with a small smile in support.

"How am I gonna sort this mess Tash?" I rubbed my tired eyes still feeling the drug's effects.

"You don't have to Babes; Trent has it all under control. Just let he and your lawyers deal with him. That's what you pay them for?!" She was right, I knew she was. "Oh Tash. What would I do without you?"

_I'd be a mess, that's what!_

"I know. I'm a saint!" She held out her hands palm up. "Come on sleeping beauty, get dressed."

"Why?"

_I didn't feel like getting dressed._

"No man is gonna spoil your life. We're going on that picnic!" She beamed. I tried my best to try to protest, but she had a great habit of changing my mind "Tash. I don't know...I..."

"I'm not taking no for an answer! Chop Chop!" She got up from my bed and patted my thigh. "We're going."

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When I was ready, I walked through to the lounge. She picked up the basket in one hand and grabbed mine with the other and we left, heading for the park. Security was tight and we made it out to the car fairly easily. There wasn't too many people waiting outside, guess they'd given up waiting.

"Wow!" Tasha said once we were inside the car. "What a rush! How do you ever get used to that?"

"Believe me; it gets a lot worse than that." I shook my head.

"Really? Don't you ever tire of it, they love you Jen!" She beamed like a proud parent at a school play.

"Never!" It was true. I would never tire of it. I loved them too.

As we sped along with the window down and the breeze blowing through our hair my phone rang.

It was Greg.

Tasha guessed straight away who it was by the look in my eyes and she snatched my phone from me. "She has nothing to say to you Greg!" She scowled between replies. "No! She's busy right now!" Huffing she narrowed her eyes even more. "Of course I'm here, someone has to be? It's not like you have been for the past seven years, is it?!" Listening again she'd finally had enough. "Fuck you Greg!" and she hung up.

Raising my eyebrows at my surprise for her defending me I said. "He will keep calling till I speak to him you know!"

She dropped my phone into her bag with a grin. "Then I'm stealing your phone! From now on, he goes through me!"

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><p><strong>AN: Thank you for all sticking with it. How about some reviews? Whatya think? Love hurts.  
><strong>

**Thanks again to my twihard till I die. See I told you its as addictive as Robert Pattinson xx **

**Stick with me, it's about to get interesting ;o)**

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	5. Chapter 5 - Wrap

**Chapter 5 - Rap**

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><p>Having Tasha stay was fantastic. We didn't know for exactly how long she'd be here though so we just had fun trying to keep my mind occupied.<p>

We watched trashy movies, got sloshed on homemade cocktails and shopped till we dropped. She would definitely be taking home more than she came with; in fact she even had to buy a new case. Having her here was the best medicine for me. Her daily dose of laughter healed wounds that would remain unseen by the public eye. She gave me reason to smile again.

After an amazing week off I knew I had to return to work. I had lots of scenes to film that were beginning to hold up the film, they had done most of the other scenes they could without me in them. But now my being there was vital to tie it altogether.

I'd come to realize being miserable wouldn't get me anywhere, apart from being depressed about something that was neither my fault or even in my control. Showing Greg I was broken was only making him look as if he'd won. I had to delve deep, put on that false smile and finally face the world.

I had to prove to everyone Jennifer March wasn't a woman to be messed with and I somehow felt I owed it to all the other people out there that had been dealt similar hands of fate, that they too could overcome their demons and once again be strong.

On my first day back on set the make-up department worked their magic and covered my saggy black eyes flawlessly. I worked hard and threw myself into my scenes. In the coming days I stayed beyond my usual working hours and didn't leave the set till I was happy with my parts. It was long; tough, tiring days, but it needed to be done.

Within the week I had finally filmed all my required scenes and my favourite three words were yelled by Brian. "That's a wrap!" The entire production crew and cast cheered, whooped and clapped. All the work was now in the hands of the editors and technically I was unemployed again.

Trent took days to talk me into going to the 'wrap' party. I really didn't feel in the mood to party, but again I thought why should I spoil my life even more than Greg already had done? I'd worked hard and I did my job well. I deserved celebrate with people that respected me as a person as well as an actress.

Tasha was especially excited. Being my plus one, it meant it would be her first Rap party. The small subject of meeting Tim Ford was an attributing factor also. She was a big fan. She'd bought a beautiful dress in a small boutique we'd found. The midnight blue satin suited her frame flawlessly, the cut draped elegantly from her shoulders, flowing down to an A line scalloped skirt that insinuated her slender legs perfectly. I styled her hair up in a twist. She looked great. One could even mistake her as being the actress.

I slipped on a little black velvet pencil dress that Tasha had talked me into buying. It was simple and elegant; which ironically when I thought about it, suited my mood. I curled my hair into ringlets and pinned it up in parts, to hopefully take the edge off my tired, gaunt face. We were good to go.

The evening began well; I really didn't know what I was worried about. No one avoided me, no one asked awkward questions. There were no stares, pointing or gossiping. We were just a group of work colleagues having a party. Of course they all by now knew why I had some time off, but they all went out their way to cheer me up. Vegas, in all had been a great project to work on. I knew I would probably remain friends with some of the cast and indeed some of the crew for a long time yet and I'd jump at the chance to work with any of them again in the future.

Tasha was in her element; being in the TV business herself she crossed paths with celebs on a daily basis, but not many American film Stars.  
>She of course was in awe of the man that was Tim Ford. Let's face it everyone who met him was. He had that aura about him. Tall, dark and extremely handsome. With just a hint of charm and grace. He lit up any room he entered very easily.<p>

"Wow! Jen he is gorgeous! Even more so in real life. I can't believe you dry humped him!" She swooned excitedly into my ear.

I grasped her arm and pulled her toward him as he stood alone at the bar. "Come on!"

"No! Jen! No!" She protested pulling back reluctantly on my arm.

"Tim!" I called out catching his attention. He turned and greeted us both with a smile.

"Hi, wow Jen you look great!" he said kissing both my cheeks as we reached him.

"Oh Thanks! Tim this is my friend From England Tasha Barratt." I gestured with my hand towards her as she stood quivering beside me. "Tash this is Tim!" He smiled at Tasha and kissed her hand. "Lovely to meet you Tasha."

"Oh my god!" She blurted out loud. Making Tim and I giggle.

"I'm not quite God-like yet, but I'm working on it!" He smirked.

"Oh Tash stop! His ego is huge already!"

Tasha just tittered uneasily.

"We're going to get a drink, you OK for one?" I pointed to his champagne he was holding.

"Yeah! I'm cool thanks." He lifted his glass to refuse.

"OK, have fun!" I smiled and pulled Tasha away. Once we'd got our drinks and moved to a safe distance I muttered. "Well whad'ya think?" I grinned already anticipating her answer.

"He, oh my! He smelt just delightful!" She looked around me to get one more glance. I had to admit, he was kind of hot. Probably my hottest co star yet.

"Welcome to show business Baby!" I cheered and we chinked champagne flutes.

A ruckus at the door then caught our attention. Lots of security were grappling with someone. "Oops! Look like someone forgot their invite." I giggled to Tasha. At many of these things uninvited guests would try to crash it. Security were usually always on the ball though.

"What the fuck is that all about?" Tasha looked shocked "Is it a raid?"

"Nah! Probably a Pap!" I tutted. "They are always trying to crash." Suddenly a huge security guard stepped right in front of me, as if to protect me from the intruder. "What the...? What the hell is going on?"

"Just stay there Mrs March!" He had one arm out in front of me and didn't take his eyes from the scuffle.

I then saw who it was being dragged to the ground. Un-mistakingly it was Greg! "What the fuck is he doing here?" I said looking at Tash in shock; she had seen him now too. "I don't know, but he's not staying long enough to us to find out!"

"Jen! Please?!" He called out to me. "Please, I just need to talk to you!" Greg was being forced to the floor.

"How the hell did he get in here?" I spat at the guard in front of me in disgust.

"We are dealing with the situation Mrs March!" He replied.

"Well not very damn well it seems!" I barked at their feeble attempt to eject him. Swiping away the guard's arm and stepping forward. The guard was in hot pursuit to protect me from Greg. He continued to plead with me. "Please Baby! I'm sorry! Please can we just talk about this?" The sheer desperation in his voice pulled a familiar chord, and he looked like shit to be frank.

_Don't let him do this Jen!_ _You are better than this!_ I warned myself. _How dare he come here and show me up like this!_

I wasn't prepared to lower myself to him anymore. The champagne seemed to give me all the dutch courage I needed as the room fell silent.

"You're pathetic Greg! You are a low life; rat bitten, lying, cheating, sad, pathetic BASTARD!" I heard one sharp intake of breath which wasn't mine. "How dare you come here and show me up in front of everyone. Who the hell do you think you are?"

"Baby please." He grovelled. "It was a mistake...I...I..." I was right, he did look pathetic.

Shaking my head slowly I growled "Too late Greg. I just hope she was worth it. Cos she is all you have now!"

"Pllllease? Jennifer!"

"I've told you a thousand times, don't call me that!" I boomed suddenly not caring where I was or that the whole room was watching us.

"Baby please? Please, I'll do anything!" Not even that would be enough for me.

I cackled at his feeble attempts. "Fuck off Greg! I'm done here!" I spun my head round to the guard beside me and snarled through clenched teeth. "Get rid of him!" He nodded and helped drag him outside, where I heard he was later bundled into a police car.

The silent room was broken by a single pair of hands clapping; shortly they were soon followed by rapturous applause. I'd finally stood up to him.

Tasha proudly pulled me into a hug. "Way to go Jen."

"Take me home Tash." I pleaded suddenly overwhelmed by it all.

.

.

.

"Oh my head!" Tasha staggered out from the bedroom in my suite some hours later. We'd hit the wine after we'd come back from the party. I ended up putting her to bed around three. "You are such a lightweight Natasha Barrett!" I giggled at her misfortune.

"Did I really drink too much last night or did I see you squish Greg like a bug?" She headed straight for a glass of water.

"Nope. You saw it! Along with the whole Production Company!" I winced remembering how embarrassed I'd felt in front of the whole room.

"Wanna talk about it?" She sipped her water and grabbed her cigarettes.

"Nope. It's not like we had a proper marriage anyway, hardly traditional was it. We never saw each other. I'm not meant to be a wife I don't think." I lit my own cigarette, my second of the day. "She's welcome to him now anyway. She's done me a huge favour. Maybe I should send her flowers?" I pondered.

"Well Babes, I wish I could say it's a shame, but I fucking hate the guy, I always did. Treated you like shit for all those years. You are way better off without him. Way better off!"

"I'll drink to that!" I smiled and as I chinked my coffee cup with her glass of water my phone rang.

Tasha groaned. "If that's him asking for bail, tell him to go fuck himself!"

"It's Trent." I said exhaling a drag of my Marlborough looking at the screen. Tasha rolled her eyes to the ceiling.

I was in no mood for conversation with Trent. "What!" I huffed, reluctantly taking the call.

"Jen I saw the news, you OK?" He sounded sincere.

"Yes why wouldn't I be? I'm just fine and dandy Trent. How the fuck did he get in there? That's what I want to know!"

"I...I don't know." he stumbled with his words. "They said you kicked his ass to the curb."

"I did. For once they are right." I took another quick puff between answers.

"What happened?"

"He showed up begging for my forgiveness. I kicked him out, think the cops carted him off. I'm really not impressed by the security they hired. It took four of them to drag his wimpy ass out! Ridiculous!"

Trent didn't sound happy either."I'll sort this!"

"That's what you said before Trent. He should never have got in there in the first place!"

"I know, and believe me heads will fucking roll I tell you! It shouldn't have got that far!" his tone turned apologetic.

"No Trent. It shouldn't have." I couldn't really blame Trent. He hadn't arranged it all. Triad were responsible for the whole fiasco.

"Is Tasha with you still?" His priority was my welfare now.

"Yes, for a few more days I think" I drew in a long draw.

"I've got a meeting set up with the lawyers tomorrow at Lauderdale to get this sorted quickly. A car will pick you up at eight OK?" The sooner the better if you asked me. "Yep!" I confirmed.

"Right, I have to go. See you there! I'm sorry that it spoiled your evening Jen. I'll have words with them, don't worry!"

"You'd better! Bye Trent." I couldn't complain really, Trent always put me first, he was great.

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><p><strong>AN: What a damn cheek?! The waster ex turning up like that! Rude! Glad she kicked his ass to the kerb. Grrrr!  
><strong>

**Thank you to my exhausted beta Twihard till I die. Think I'm wearing her out! :oP **

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**Love and Squidgy hugs **

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	6. Chapter 6 - Freedom

**Chapter 6 - Freedom**

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><p>The meeting with the solicitors went well and the file for divorce was submitted, he hadn't a leg to stand on as the two remaining houses were in my name and his infidelity cancelled any rights he had on my estate according to the pre-nup we'd signed. He was royally fucked. No wonder he'd begged me for my forgiveness! They said it should be settled swiftly, seeing as no children were involved. I only had my career and the lord to thank for that.<p>

A few days later I sadly had to say goodbye to Tasha. She had been my rock through this mess and I hated to see her go home. I was so grateful for her dropping everything to be with me. I mean how many friends would grab a flight to be by your side halfway across the globe at the drop of a hat? Not many I can tell you!

I left my hotel that day too and traveled back to my house in New York to pack up Greg's things. I needed closure. I needed to pack him away in a box, seal it and ship out my memories. I was a strong, single woman, with a great job that others would kill for.

_I could do this on my own, couldn't I?_

I had my homes, I had my health, and I had my age all in my favour. He may have screwed with my personal life, but he wasn't going to get his hands on my happiness. Never.

Pulling into my drive, I had to admit it felt so good to be home and it would feel a damn site better once his stuff was gone. I planned to ship it all out to his Paris home. This is all he had left from our many years together. I no longer cared what he did with it; he could deal with it there.

It took best part of four days to pack up all his belongings, every piece of our history together that I didn't want was now sealed in cardboard boxes. It felt good. I felt cleansed. Like the best detox program, I was clean. I called the courier company within a few hours I sent them on their way. I was rid of the man that broke my heart, just for the sake of a cheap fuck.

As my filming was now done too I set about rebuilding my life and as every day passed I began to feel stronger about where I was headed. It may have also been helped by the fact I was aided by a few Valium, a great friend and a wonderful manager. I was now finally on my way.

.

.

.

With my divorce now through, today four months on I was traveling to the press conference for 'Vegas or Bust'.

Donning my favourite sleek, figure hugging royal blue dress with matching shoes, I checked my reflection one last time before I set the house alarm and pulled my front door closed. Dropping my Gucci glasses over my eyes I slid into the back seat my waiting car.

"Thank you Paul!" I said as he gently closed the door behind me. He was my favourite driver in New York. He always seemed chirpy and happy to see me. It made all the difference when you were having a bad day. As he slid in the driving seat he called back to me. "You're very welcome Ms Austen"

Returning to my maiden name felt great. Trent wasn't sure it would be great PR but I didn't care. If it meant I had to rebuild my career from scratch; so be it. That man no longer deserved to be associated with me. Nor I with him. Thankfully everything seemed to be working out so far. Nobody seemed interested in my story any more, only what movie I had in mind next. I sometimes got scared of being lonely, never feeling warm arms around me ever again, but as long as I had my career; my friend and my family. I didn't need anyone else.

I, as usual was the last to arrive. A few press snapped my picture as I stepped out my car. Today was a good day, I was happy to be alive and promoting my new film to the public and industry. A few called me by my old surname, to which I ignored. Hell, it took me a while to get used it. So I expected it for a while yet from the press.

I made my way inside and spotted Trent speaking to some of the conference organizers. I scanned the room and saw the main cast members but didn't get time to chat as we were called in straight away. Our names were called by this big chubby guy, I assumed worked there. We all filed in, in order and sat down to the long table, behind our name cards. Cameras clicked away as we settled. I exchanged glances with Trent as he made his way to his seat.

Brian Stanley introduced us all and opened the floor for questions. After been to a few of these conferences now, I sort of knew the questions that would be asked, they were always a lot of the same. After a few questions to Brian about casting a gentleman shot up his hand, someone handed him a microphone. "I have a question for Ms Austen?" My ears pricked up. I smiled politely at him awaiting my probably boring question.

"Ms Austen? Seth Greenway from Brooklyn Agency. As we've heard before in your previous interviews we know you aren't a fan of sex scenes. So how did you find the ones in this movie? Are they getting any easier with time?"

"Um, remember that score I owe you Jen!" Tim muttered into his microphone, causing a ripple of laughter around the room.

"Yeah, I suppose they do a little." I pinched my finger and thumb together leaving a small gap to represent my words. "When I first read the script and it said Selina rips off Charles' clothes, I thought hmm. This just may be a good movie to do. Yeah?!" I nodded frantically in jest as another titter filled the room. "Nah! It's always easy when working with a great cast and crew; it puts your mind at ease. It was OK I suppose, so I guess the answer is yes." As I glanced beside me at Tim, who nudged me on the shoulder playfully.

Thankfully that was the only question I got asked today. I was secretly dreading the subject of my marriage cropping up.

_Maybe Trent had been pre-warning them when he was chatting to that fella when I came in?_

The rest of the hour dragged as they all did, but promotion was a key part of the movies success. So no matter how much we hated them. They needed doing. With thanks from us all the conference came to a close, and as we were dismissed a few people came forward for signatures. All had great comments for me which was really uplifting, given my recent circumstances.

Returning backstage we all posed for official cast pictures. I'd smiled so much my face hurt, and what's more I thought I was getting another headache.

"You look great Jen..." Tim said handing me a water bottle. "..Really you do!" He had one of those smiles that lightened his whole face. I couldn't help thinking he looked rather dashing himself today in his best navy suit.

"Oh thank you Tim. You look dapper yourself today, and we co-ordinated." I relayed a hand between us, reflected we were both in blue.

He chuckled. "I noticed. Least the pictures will look good this time. My last press conference I came straight from my little sister's school play. My agent wasn't impressed."

"Oh lord, I bet her wasn't!" I sipped some of my water.

"I'm really sorry to hear about that asshole you were married too, I really don't understand how men do that when they have beautiful women at home!" My cheeks flushed automatically.

"Yeah, well. Some don't know about the green grass, they always think its better on the other side!" I shrugged my shoulders.

Tim shook his head in disgust. "That sucks! He's a dick! You are way better off without him. You look much happier as well."

"Aww. Thank you Tim! I actually am feeling much happier. I never thought I'd say it. But I do."

"I mean it too Jen. Never blame yourself! He's a prick!" He toasted his drink and walked away, leaving just his aftershave smell behind.

_Mmm! What was that?_

"Jen!" Brian called from behind me, snapping me out my daydream.

"Yes!" I swiveled round to face him.

"This is my leading lady." He introduced me to some bigwig in the industry. He did say his name, but I wasn't really listening. I could still feel Tim's eyes staring at my bottom in my figure hugging dress from across the room. So I just nodded and smiled politely. I was an actress after all.

Once we'd finished promoting, I caught up with Trent and said goodbye to everyone. I took some numbers and we all said we'd catch up another time. Tim gave me the biggest hug. He gave me his number and said he definitely wanted to work with me again someday. I think I'd like that too.

Formalities done I headed home again, kicked off my heels once inside and pulled the pin from my hair, letting the long curls fall around my shoulders.

Flumping down onto the sofa, I heaved a sigh. I was shattered. That headache had disappeared and just left me exhausted.

I groaned as my phone began to ring.

_What now? Why did I get no peace?_

Slouching forward I found it deep within my bag. It was Tasha. Taking the call I smiled.

"Hey Babes!" I was just happy it wasn't work related.

"Hiya! How did it go?" She knew my schedule better than me sometimes.

"Yep, fine. All done and promoted!" I sighed.

"Was the dashing Tim There?" She used that childish tone, like friends at a school disco.

"Tash! You know he was." I rummaged in my bag again for a ciggie lit up. A habit of mine I had whilst I spoke on the phone.

"Did he smell gooood!" We both giggled at her expression.

"You know what? He did actually!" I took another long drag.

_I never did find out what he was wearing!_

"You are so damn lucky, hot young actors draped over you on a daily basis! Damn girl!"

"Meh! It's just work!" I shrugged it off.

"Just work! You are spoiled, you know that!" I knew she was teasing.

"No I'm not!" I played along.

"He is sooooo into you, you know!"

_I wish she'd stop saying that. He was not! Besides he was very married._

"No, he's not. He's got a very beautiful wife Tasha."

"Well I think he likes you, he was alllll over you at that party, and didn't you chat after the conference?" She exhaled, I guessed she was smoking too.

"I don't care if he likes me, he's married and yeah of course I spoke to him!" I drew back on my ciggie again.

"Spill then! Come on!"

"There's nothing to spill. He just said how much of a dick my ex was." I said honestly.

"See! He's smart as well as hot and talented." She giggled.

"Tash!" I groaned.

_What was it about men that turned to fully grown women into hormonal teenagers?_

"Anyway..." I continued and drew the last hard pull on my cigarette before blowing out the cloud of poison and stubbing it out. "I have some news for you!"

"Ooo what? What, what?" She pleaded excitedly.

"I'm coming to London on Wednesday for a while, I have to pack up some things and send them to Paris. His lawyer requested it. Do you wanna meet up?"

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><p><strong>AN: Hello? Is there anyone out there? Please stop by my PM and leave some reviews. I want to see what you think?**

**So Jen's free. Good ridance to bad rubbish, that's what I say. x**

**Enormous thanks to my beautiful beta. Twihard till I die. love OOOoooo. **

**Next! **

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	7. Chapter 7 - Home

**Chapter 7 - Home  
><strong>

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><p>"What a stupid ass question, course I bloody well do! Look, while I have you on the the phone I wanted to ask you something?" Tasha always did this. It normally meant a signed autograph for someone who knows someone she worked with.<p>

"Yeeahh?" I asked suspiciously.

"Well I wasn't going to bother asking you cos I know what you normally say, but I figured if I didn't ask then you may get cranky if I we.."

Losing my patience I had to stop her blabbering. "What do you want Tash?"

"I was gonna drag Sam along, but he can't get time off work. I've got these tickets for this band on Saturday night." She pleaded.

"What band?" I really wasn't into pop music, I liked a bit of Take That I suppose, But The Carpenters and Don Williams were more my kind of music. Easy Listening, relaxing stuff. "It's not a screaming girly fan type band is it?" I screwed up my face.

_I hated nutjob screaming girlies._

"No!" She tutted. "Well not really, they came on the show last month. They're called 'Trenchcoat', odd name I know, but they sounded great. Rock/Pop type." She was giving it the hard sell I could tell, it would make her happy and I suppose it would give me something to do at least when I went home.

"Hmm." I pondered aloud.

"Oh please Jen? They are really good, I know you will love it and the lead singer is extremely spunky!" Her tone when she said the last word made me giggle.

"Spunky huh?" I laughed.

"Dreamingly so. The type you wouldn't kick out of bed in the morning for anything." She cooed.

_Yeah like I was interested in the male species right now. __The things I did for that woman!_

"I suppose so!" I rolled my eyes. "They'd better not be mosh pit ticket though!"

"Ohh, Yippee!" I heard her clap with delight. "No they're VIP tickets. Up in the stands. They Include Backstage passes to meet them before the gig too." She exclaimed excitedly.

_Swell! Meet and greet with a band I don't even know. Great!_

"I'm really not into grunge bands Tash. Can't we just go to the gig?" I whined starting to regret my agreeing to go.

"It's not grunge! They are actually very good. It'll be fun!"

I groaned. "Famous last words. On one condition Missy?"

"What? Anything!"

"Only if you help me sort the house. I'm really not looking forward to it one bit." The thought of seeing his face all over my house again depressed me.

"Done!" She agreed in a snap. "Oh shit! I gotta go. Producers on the warpath, see you when you get back, OK?" With that she was gone. Before I even had chance to say goodbye.

_Charming. Good job I loved her. What have you just agreed too Jen!?_

.

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Trent arranged a car to meet me at Heathrow, security was tight as always. I seriously didn't know why I needed it everywhere I went. It was just little old me, Jennifer Austen. Regardless, Trent being the great manager he was, insisted.

"Ms Austen." A big buff security guard nodded at me as he waited at the bottom of the steps of the private jet I'd traveled home in. I smiled wearily and descended the three steps to the concrete. A woman in a high viz jacket greeted me and told me to follow her into the terminal building.

_ As if I didn't know where to go by now?_

I was ushered into the VIP lounge where I waited a few minutes for my luggage. It would have been a damn site quicker than that if they have let me pull my case myself, but no. They insisted that, that too, was their pleasure.

_Tut!_

After I'd had my passport checked, I was keen to just get home. I was exhausted. I made my way through the terminal swiftly. A few fans shouted my name as I appeared through the arrivals channel.

_How did they know I was here? I didn't even know till a few days ago._

I waved at them and smiled despite feeling the tiredness run through my feet and up through my body, making my head pound. I politely approached the barrier to say some hello's.

"Oh my god! Jen, you look fab!" One lady called out. I went over to her and signed her book she was clutching with dear might. "Oh, Thank you. I replied politely. "How you lot know I'm coming, I don't know?"

Another shouted. "Is Tim as hot in real life as he is on film?" This made me giggle. "Yep, he sure is."

_ He'd love that!_

"Miss Austen. Ms Austen, can you sign this please?" A small girl asked beaming from ear to ear. "Course i can Sweetie. Here." I took her pen and scribbled my showbiz autograph which didn't resemble my real signature whatsoever. Her face lit up even more and she squealed to a woman who I assumed was her mother. "Look! She signed it! She signed it!" The woman thanked me for signing it. "That's OK. That's a very pretty hat she's wearing." I pointed to the small child's head wear. I always remembered rule one of being a celeb. Always compliment whenever possible.

Cameras flashed in my face from the press area, causing spots before my eyes whenever I blinked. One flashed very near making me flinch slightly. The security fella had seen enough. "Times up!" He caught my arm and began leading me away.

"Thank you all for coming out to see me. Get home safe." I waved to my fans and smiled one last time to the press.

_Good press was always a bonus._

.

Despite my thoughts of seeing Greg's mug all over my house, It felt great to be back when I turned the key in my door at home. London always felt great to me. It was home.

Tasha always did a great job looking in on my house from time to time and the housekeepers had fully stocked the fridge. It looked great. The only thing that didn't feel good about it was indeed all Greg's things. His cheery smiling face reflected back smugly at me from the pictures on the wall, but I wasn't going to let him spoil my mood anymore.

The pictures were the first to go, before I'd even kicked off my shoes. I stomped to the kitchen and grabbed a bin liner from the drawer, moving along swiftly every last picture smashed against the other inside the bag. Once the walls and dresser were clear, I marched to the front door and dropped the bag into the wheelie bin with a sigh of relief.

_In the bin. Where all rubbish deserved to be._

My shoes were then off and a glass of wine appeared in my hand. Molding to my white soft leather sofa I heaved a heavy sigh. It was good to be back in London. I slept well that night, I wasn't sure if it was the bottle of wine I sank or the jet lag, but I wasn't complaining.

Tasha was working the next day, so I started my Greg detox alone. Wardrobes, drawers, his music and the office. Everything I no longer wanted was thrown in the boxes the courier had dropped round in the morning when I called to book them. In the afternoon I visited my mother. It had been ages since I'd seen her, so I couldn't wait to go home, home. The house I'd grown up in. It never changed, not even the neighbours.

We spent five hours catching up. She was keeping well, Living alone since Cancer had cruelly taken my father four years ago, she had little choice to carry on. We missed him something terrible, but I was so glad I still had my mother around, I just wish I could see her more often. She came out to New York if I was away filming during Christmas time. If I wasn't, I usually came home. Christmases in London were just amazing.

The next day, a Friday. Tasha came round as promised to help. I'd arranged the courier to arrive at seven that evening, so we set to work. We cleared all the paperwork, his nic nac's, thousands of books, his shoes, rest of his clothes, even down to his toothbrush and toiletries. By six thirty that evening we sealed the last box closed. Greg March was out of my life, forever and it felt great waving the van away as it crunched down my gravel driveway and out of the security gate bulging with all his belongings.

"Woah! I'm beat!" I said flopping down in the chair.

"Me too. We need a drink!" Tasha grinned wiggling her eyebrows. She marched out to the kitchen and returned with a perfectly chilled bottle of white wine and two glasses.

"Do you realize we haven eaten all day?" I scoffed realizing we hadn't even stopped for lunch.

_No wonder I was starving._

"I know! I'm famished. Let's have take out! Chinese?" She clapped, drawing her phone from her pocket and pressed a few buttons.

_She probably had them on sped dial!_

We ate, drank and smoked the evening away, before we knew it, it hit one in the morning. Tasha began to gather her things to go home.

"Aw, don't go. Stay with me? Please? It'll feel lonely tonight all by myself." The house felt empty now, I swear our voices had begun to echo.

"Sam will wonder where I am? She shrugged.

"Ring him then. I don't want to be alone tonight." I pouted and blinked knowing exactly how to reel her in.

"Sure. OK! I'll just go ring him while I go for a pee." She rose from her chair and trotted out the downstairs bathroom.

.

"Afternoon Sweetcheeks!" Tasha smiled sat up to my breakfast bar when I surfaced from my bedroom the next afternoon.

"Where did the morning go?" I winced, with a small thumping heartbeat in my head.

_Did I drink that much last night?_

"It was in your dreams. Sleep well? You were hammered last night!" She licked her finger and flicked through the pages a magazine my housekeeper had left for me. She liked to leave them for me to keep me up to date with the celeb gossip.

"Like a baby." I yawned, rubbing the sleep from my crusty eyes and headed straight for the Tassimo machine.

"Hey! Don't forget we're going out tonight too." She didn't look up from the mag as she spoke.

_What? What day was it anyway? Where were we going? I forgot._

Seeing my confused face she reminded me. "The gig?"

"Oh god no!" I grimaced, pushing the magic coffee button.

_Now, where were my cigarettes?_

Tasha's shoulders dropped and she tutted loudly. "Oh come on Jen, you promised!?"

"Ugh!" I groaned, and plodded into the lounge In search for my box of Marlbrough. I sifted through the take away boxes and wine bottles which still covered the coffee table from last night.

"Where's my ciggies?" I called out to Tasha before immediately finding them hidden under a box. "No worries I've found them." I then began the search for my lighter. "Fuck's sake!" I cursed tossing the boxes aside.

Hearing my cursing she joined me in the lounge. "What now?" She tutted placing her hands on her hips.

"I can never find a fucking lighter in this house!" I huffed, giving up and made my way back to the kitchen to light it on the gas hob. I turned and leaned against the cooker, sucking in the fumes.

_Oh! That first drag of the day was always the best I swear it._

Tasha re-appeared in the kitchen with an armful of the take away boxes.

"Leave that, the cleaner will do it!" I wafted a hand in front my face before drawing on the end of my cigarette again.

"Being a famous actress is no excuse to live like a slob Jen! It only takes two minutes to clear up." She tossed the empty boxes into the rubbish bin and stood to face me with crossed arms.

"What?" I exhaled the plume of smoke.

"You are coming out aren't you?" she scowled.

"Yes. OK! I'll go, just let me wake up in peace Tash!"

_Yep, the thumping in my head was definitely getting louder._

"I'll get your coffee." She smirked sounding very pleased with herself.

_What would I do without Tasha? She brightened my boring days no end, she always made me smile. I suppose one small gig wouldn't hurt, right?_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I hate moving house. So much junk. I'm glad Jen had rid herself of her junk. *Waves goodbye to Greg.* **

**So they are going to see a band. Wonder if they are good? *evil grin***

**Thank yooo to my beta Twihard till I die. xx Huggles xx**

**Onwards then...**

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	8. Chapter 8 - Trenchcoat

**Chapter 8 - Trenchcoat**

* * *

><p>Tasha had cleared it with security of the venue that Jennifer Austen would be her plus one and we were told to use the VIP entrance.<p>

My English driver Steve opened Tasha's door outside the O2 arena then came round to open mine and I climbed out. Some girls recognized me and screamed my name from the barrier. I smiled and waved their general direction before making our way inside. We were escorted by security up to the VIP lounge where apparently the band was going to have pre-gig drinks to greet the celebs.

_Least I got a drink out of it._

I noticed some familiar faces from the small screen and some came over to say hello. Tasha had met some of them on the show where she worked too. So I didn't feel like I was name dropping. A small cheer erupted and my heart skipped, taking me back to the rap party in Florida.

"Don't worry!" Tasha must have seen the colour drain from my cheeks. "He's not gonna turn up here, It's just the band coming in!" She laughed nervously.

"Great!" I rolled my eyes and sipped my glass of Chardonnay.

_Gees I felt old right now._

I flippantly turned towards the ruckus by the door and saw the four blokes I gathered were the band. They were probably all around my age, which surprised me a little as I expected them to be in their teens. One in particular stood out a mile. He was tall, lean and had messy mousy blonde hair; topped off with the most beautiful smile I'd ever seen. It showed off his perfectly aligned teeth and radiant eyes. Which I now noticed were a piercing green colour as he began to walk through the people towards us. Suddenly realizing I was staring, I pulled away my gaze and falsely scanned the rest of the room.

"Oh shit!" Tasha grabbed my arm. "There's Marcus, the lead singer I was telling you about. He's fucking hot!" She whispered as he grew nearer.

Amused by her reaction I replied. "Does Sam know you fan-girl like a fanny at these fellas?"

"No! Don't be silly. I have to play it cool in my line of work. Oh my god! They're coming over!" She sang the last bit and looked a bit like she very nearly wet herself, which made me giggle again.

One of the band; not the hot one though, made a beeline for us with a smile.

"Natasha Barrett, isn't it?" He said to her holding out his hand in gesture.

"Tasha!" She corrected him, reaching out to take his hand. "From L.W.W!" The chap took her hand and lent in to kiss both of her now pink cheeks.

"Nice to see you again Tasha, glad you could make it." He then turned to me. "Oh! I know who you are." He smiled at me politely and took my hand as he had with Tasha and kissed both my cheeks too. "I'm Tez!"

_What aftershave was he wearing? _It smelt lovely.

"Oh Hi." I still got flustered when people recognized me but I didn't even know then at events. Another member of the band approached from behind him. "Jennifer Austen?" He said grinning.

_Yep, there goes the blood, straight to my cheeks._

Taking my hand, he kissed me too. "I'm Mark!" He said smiling.

"Hi!" I said again.

_Ooh another aftershave. _I loved men who smelt nice.

Tez introduced Mark to Tasha again. She was loving this. Mark looked back at me. "I've seen your movies, very nice!" He nodded.

"Oh, thank you! Kind of you to say so." I blushed harder.

"Marcus! Paul! Come meet Tasha and Jennifer." Tez beckoned them over.

"Jen!" I corrected a bit too loudly.

_Gees, Jen! Why do you always make such an ass of yourself?! _I scolded myself.

Tasha rolled her eyes. "It's Jen. She hates her full name. It's always printed wrong in the press."

"Oh I'm sorry, I apologize." He said putting a hand to his chest.

"No worries." I laughed it off and gave Tasha some evils while they looked back at Marcus and Paul.

_Shit! The hot one was coming over!_

"Wow! Jen Austen!" Marcus smiled as he walked to us with a glass in his hand. I had been right; he did have the most wonderful green eyes. I could smell his Brandy on his breath.

_Oh that smile!_

"Um...Yes!" I tittered shyly feeling the burn in my cheeks.

"I just loved 'Days of Dreams." He nodded. "Excellent work!"

"Oh, why thank you! Er, Marcus was it?" I extended my hand.

"Yes! Sorry for my rudeness. Marcus Perdy. Lead." He grinned taking my hand and kissing it, instead of my face.

_Oh how disappointing! I want him to kiss me. Why did I have butterflies in my stomach? I don't remember eating grubs!_

"Hey Jen!" The forth blokey said over Marcus' shoulder. "I'm Paul."

"Hi!" I replied.

"Marcus, Paul this is Tasha from L.W.W. Do you remember?" Tez introduced them to her.

"Yes I do. Nice to see you again Tasha." Marcus smiled and kissed her hand too. I swear I heard her heart pounding from where I stood.

"Hi Tasha." Paul grinned too.

"Hiya Paul." Tasha blushed.

Marcus stepped awkwardly back in front of me allowing Paul to greet Tasha.

"I'm sorry I'm useless remembering names. It's a good job you all know me. Cos I sure forget sometimes." I giggled nervously and glanced at Tasha who was now speaking to Paul.

Marcus sipped his Brandy. "So what you working on now? Or can't you say?"

"I've just finished a movie with Tim Ford, for Triad Productions?" I mirrored his action and sipped my wine.

"Tim Ford? Wow! Great actor!" He grinned. "Look forward to seeing that one. I've seen all your work." He widened his grin flashing his teeth at me.

_Oh my lord above!_

Shaking away my thoughts I got back to the conversation. "Really? You don't have to say that you know?" I tittered slightly wishing I could have a cigarette right that second.

"Nah! Honestly. Days of Dreams, Honour and Obey. Three Nights." He reeled off some of my back catalogue.

"Wow! Great detective work!" I nodded; impressed my work would interest such a hot singer. He didn't seem the chick flick type at all.

"What's the new one about? Can you say?" His laugh took me into a trance like state.

_He's stunning and he smells like..._

"Huh?" I said watching his rosy pink lips move.

"The plot! Can you say? Or no." He rephrased the question slightly.

_God he must think I'm simple. Snap out of it Jen!_

"Um, yeah! It's called 'Vegas or Bust'. Typical married millionairess catches her husband with his pants down, as it were. Ironically!" I guffawed, before scanning the room for Tasha who'd disappeared somewhere.

"What's ironic about that?" He spoke softly and sipped his liquor.

"Oh! Um. Nothing!" I shook my head then thought quickly on my feet. "I best go tear Tasha away from the celebs, she can talk for England!"

"Oh OK, sure, hey you are coming to the after show party aren't you? You are both more than welcome."

_Was I blushing? I hope to god I wasn't._

"Oh I'm not sure what we are doing yet. But thanks for the invite." I held my hand out to shake his again and this time when he took it and pulled me in to kiss my cheeks. Thankfully we didn't go the same way.

"It's at the Plaza Hilton. Be great to see you there! If you can make it?" He flashed those perfect teeth again to seal the deal and caused even more stirrings in my undercarriage.

_Yep, I was gone!_ _Sold to Marcus Perdy!_

"Oh. Well, we'll...err...have to see. See you later maybe?" I stuttered and turned to walk to Tasha, thank god she'd appeared again. "Where the hell did you go?" I said through gritted teeth.

"I had to go to the loo! You looked cosy with err...Marcus?" She wiggled her eyebrows.

"Just being polite." I shrugged, to which she just laughed.

"What's so funny?" I huffed.

"Nothing! So, what you think? Isn't he just spunky?" She drooled over him from across the room.

"Well, he's definitely young and dumb and very probably full of..." Tasha interrupted me.

"Jen! Play nice!" She scolded me.

"I am playing nice and don't go sneaking off like that again!" I said in a loud whisper.

"I told you I needed a wee, I couldn't really tell 'Trenchcoat' that could I?" She whispered back.

"Whatever! Look, can you smoke in here? I'm gasping!" I looked round for a sign, knowing the smoking laws in The U.K were different now.

"Well they are over there..." She pointed to two celebs I recognized, but for the life of me couldn't think of their names. This was nothing new for me. "..So I'd say yes." She nodded.

"Good! I need to calm my nerves!" I rummaged through my clutch bag and found the packet.

Tasha just laughed at me.

I offered her one but she shook her head. Dropping the packet back inside, I rummaged again for a lighter.

_Shit! I forgot I lost it_.

A flame appeared in front my eyes.

"Oh thanks!" I said, assuming it was Tasha. I followed the hand as I drew back the first drag.

"You're welcome" It was Marcus.

Drawing back too much, it made me cough.

"Filthy habit!" He said making his own wobble in between his lips as he spoke, before lighting it.

"Tell me about it." I coughed again into my hand to clear the tickle. He exhaled his draw and turned to Tasha.

"I was just saying to Jen, that you're both invited to the after party at the Plaza Hilton. If you hadn't got to dash off anywhere?" He shrugged before pulling again on his cigarette.

_Why does it always look hot when men held them in a pencil grip like that?_

Greg had hated my smoking. I think that's why I did it? Just to piss him off!

"Oh? She didn't say?" Tasha looked from him to me accusingly.

"I didn't get chance?" I snapped. "We really wouldn't want to crash." I flashed her a disproving look.

"Nonsense! My guests?" He blew another white plume into the air.

"Then we'd love to, thanks for the invite." Tasha jumped in.

_Damn you Tasha!_

"Right. I have a show to do. See you ladies later then?" He winked and retreated to gather the rest of the band.

"Sure." We both said in unison.

Once he was out of ear shot she squealed quietly. "Jesus, he's so damn hot! Shit! I forgot to ask for an autograph! You got any paper? Maybe..." She giggled. ".. I can get him to sign these babies." She clutched her boobs and wiggled them at me.

"Oh! Now that's just sick!" I said in disgust, but I couldn't help but laugh. She was relentless.

.

We made our way to our seats in the VIP box, the place was packed out. The atmosphere was electric. Maybe I _could_ force myself to enjoy this after all? There were five rows of plush red velvet pull down type seats. A lot like expensive cinema seats.

"Ooh swish!" Tasha cooed finding our seats in the front row. "Great view huh?" She said pulling down the seat pad.

"Yes, very good." I nodded. "Loud though!" I raised my voice over the din of the chanting crowd.

"Oh don't be such a fuddy duddy!" She complained. "We're here to have fun!"


	9. Chapter 9 - Party

**Chapter 9 - Party**

* * *

><p>"I have to admit, that was actually really good." I held up my hands. Tasha was right, they were a great band.<p>

"See, I told you!" She said smugly with a harsh voice after screaming in my ear the whole time. "So? Are we going to the party?"

"Oh Tash! I don't know? It's not really my thing. All sorts get passed around at those kinds of parties. I have to be careful with these things. The press would have a field day." We slowly made our way to the VIP exit, where my car would be waiting.

"Oh please? Don't be a woosy pants?" She had a whine that would give any teenager a good run for their money.

The middle aged actor; who I still couldn't remember his name, brushed past us and asked if we were going to the party.

"Oh, we're not sure yet. Undecided." I smiled.

"They throw a mean party after their tours. You should go, they're great." He waved and was gone.

"Huh!" I coughed.

"See! Even he said it was good!" Tasha gloated.

"Talk about coercion?" I sighed, defeated.

Tasha got out her phone and started tapping a message to someone.

"Who you texting now?"

"Sam!" She smirked "To say I'm gonna be staying at yours again."

"Tasha!" She'd left me little choice; I couldn't let her go alone. So it looked like I was joining her. Her plan had worked right down to the letter.

.

I'd been to a few wrap parties before, but never a band tour party. Neither had Tasha. I had visions of loud pop music, strippers and drugs being passed around the room in bongs. Drunken middle aged actors making complete fools of themselves, while the younger generation raved to beats they thought ruled the world.

We pulled up outside and the hotel looked the expensive kind; I'd not stayed there before, so wasn't sure of the clientele. But it didn't look the sort of place that would allow strippers, which put my mind at ease a little.

"Wait! Tasha grabbed my arm as we were about to get out the car, I thought she'd suddenly changed her mind.

"What?"

"Lippy!" She delved her hand into her bag, pulling out her lipstick and mirror. After applying she blotted her lips together and held them out to me. I sighed but accepted them. If I was going to this thing, I may as well look good. I checked my hair and eyes too and handed it back to her.

She chucked it in her bag again and made to open the door. I caught her arm. "Look, any shit and we go right? I don't need the bad press. OK?"

She nodded feverishly and we climbed out. I told Steve if I needed him I'd bleep him. He said he'd be waiting in the car park. Ideal, the getaway vehicle was sorted.

"What the hell am I doing here?" I sang nervously to myself as we made our way inside.

"Shh!" She put her finger to her lips. "It sounds like it's in there." She moved her finger to point to a room just off the reception area where music boomed away.

Two big burly bouncers stood by the doors. They recognized me, but asked Tasha for a pass to which she happily provided. They both swooshed opened the doors and wished us a good evening.

A sea of muttering and music flooded our ears. I quickly scoured the room for the familiar faces from earlier, a few I recognized again and acknowledged as we walked in and up to the bar.

Tasha got out some cash to pay the barman for the bottle of wine, but he explained it was a free bar. "Ohh! Right! Thanks." She grinned to me. "Free booze?!" She whooped. I just knew right there and then, she was gonna get smashed!

A youngish couple of lads approached us at a table we'd grabbed. "Oh god!" I flapped. "If anyone offers me drugs I'll die!" I tried to sink down into my seat. "You're Jen March aren't you?" One said.

"Jen Austen now, yes." I looked around fakely to try to make them lose interest.

"I'm really sorry to bother you but can my brother have your autograph?" He smiled politely as the other lad held out a pen and paper.

"Oh?" I said slightly shocked.

"Sorry. I know you probably get hounded all the time. We're big fans in our house." The slightly older lad said.

"Sure. Who do I pen it too?" I replied taking the pen and paper.

"Russell, Please?" Said the younger male beaming.

I scribbled a small note and handed it back. "There you go."

"Thank you so much. Sorry to bother you again. We are very excited about Vegas or Bust. Thank you." They retreated happily.

"Hmm." Tasha narrowed her eyes together and sipped her wine.

"What?" I said shrugging, taking a large gulp from my own glass.

"We come here for Trenchcoat and Jennifer Austen steals the thunder again!" She teased.

"Oh don't be silly! I can't help it if I'm sort after." I flicked back my hair flirtatiously.

We'd already downed the first bottle before the band even got there. They arrived looking dapper, obviously showered and changed from their dripping wet sodden stage clothes they'd left wearing at the end of the show.

"They're here." Tasha nudged me and pointed them out as they came through the crowds. They waved to us as they passed straight through to the bar. I was a little disappointed they didn't stop to chat actually. Especially Marcus, but I couldn't let on to Tasha I thought so. I was being ridiculous anyway. There were much younger prettier girls there than us. Why would they want to speak with us?

"Oh I love this song, can we dance?" Tasha had been fidgeting in her seat like a child desperate for a wee for the last 10 minutes, she was gagging to get up and dance.

"Err, no!" I waved my hand in front my face. "No! Definitely not!"

.

Collapsing into our seats, we giggled like school girls. We'd forgotten all about the band and were having the most fun we'd had in years.

"Oh, god!" I puffed breathlessly. "I haven't done the Macarena for years!"

"This is great. I'm glad you came round to the idea." She grinned.

"I had little choice with you around!" I teased with a sudden craving for a ciggie. "Can you smoke in here?" I pulled one from my bag.

"Nah-ah" she shook her head "UK law."

_Damn! That would mean going out in the cold._

"You coming?" I wiggled the cigarette at her.

"Nah! I need a wee." She slurred slightly.

"OK, don't go wandering off. Meet you back here." I said before making off outside.

The chilly night air hit me as I pushed open the door. Routing through my bag I tried to find a lighter, before realizing I was still missing it. "Damn!" I cursed aloud.

"Oh, here!" A blonde man lit his lighter for me.

"Ah cheers! I really need to buy another one." I leaned into the flame and drew back deep. "Thanks!" I smiled once it lit.

"No worries Ms Austen." He smiled and returned to his conversation with his male companion.

I wrapped my free arm around me, grasping at any warmth possible. I cowered around the corner to shelter from the breeze. The main door swished open and I glanced up thinking it maybe Tasha. It was Marcus, he didn't seem to see me at first, or at least I didn't think he did. He bent his head low cupping his hand round to lit his cigarette and caught me gazing as he raised his head up again. He drew in and smiled, exhaled and walked towards me.

"Hey!" He said bashful like. The breeze blew a lock of my hair loose across my face; I tucked it behind my ear away from my lit Marlborough Light.

"Hey! Great gig!" I pulled back on it again desperately trying not to shiver.

"Thanks! I wasn't sure my voice would hold out tonight, been a long tour. You made it then?" He referred to the party.

"Yeah. Tasha insisted." I tittered.

He smiled in reply.

"Bet your family will be glad to have you home for a while now?"

"Yes, they came tonight actually; my brothers said they got your Autograph in there." He nodded his head to inside the party.

"Oh? They were your brothers? I didn't know that!"

_Drug dealers! Really Jen!_

"Hmm." He nodded again. "Mum and Dad came to the show, but this isn't their thing."

I laughed nervously taking another drag. "No, I guess not!" The two males that had been outside rejoined the party, leaving us alone.

"You look cold, you OK?" He lowered one eyebrow looking concerned.

"No, I'll be fine. So? Is there a Mrs Perdy?"

_Wait! What was I saying?_

Marcus just laughed and took another draw.

"I'm so sorry! That's none of my business, forgive me. Me and my mouth."

_Jennifer!_

"No! It's OK. It's fine and no, there is no Mrs Perdy or Mrs Perdy-to-be..." He smiled.

"Oh!" I replied nervously.

_GULP!_

"...and no! I'm not gay." He grinned, lighting his cigarette again as it had burnt out.

"I'm really sorry for being rude. My mouth just runs away with myself. It's my biggest cause of lawsuits in the U.S." I joked.

"Really?" He exhaled. "That's not what I heard."

_What?_

"Wha...What did you hear?" I stumbled forming my words. Realizing my cigarette was dead I stubbed it out in the receptacle provided before re-wrapping both arms around me for warmth.

"I'm sorry, seems my mouth can get rude too." He shook his head.

"Try me?" I challenged.

"Heard you kicked out your prick of a husband for being a dick."

_Fair description._

"Hmm, well that much is true." I hugged myself covering my obvious chill in my bra area.

"Fucking winds me up that does. Why do some men throw good things away for what is more often than not someone sporting a dogface?"

I laughed aloud at his description. "It's a shame all men don't share your opinion, my life would be a lot happier!" I huffed.

"I'd have put the twat in hospital, not just thrown him out!" He sneered.

"Where were you when I needed you?" I half joked then blushed when I realized I meant it.

He took his last draw and flicked his butt out into the darkness before replying. "Let's go in. It's cold." He motioned inside.

I answered with a silent smile and he opened the door for me. As I walked through first he placed his free hand in the dip of my lower back. I shivered under his touch; luckily the chill in the air disguised it.

As we returned into the warmth of the party, all I could concentrate on was his hand inches from my ass. It had been many years since I felt knots in my belly like I did right then.

He leaned in close to my ear and asked if I'd like a drink.

"I should really get back to Tasha." I refused.

_Noooooo. You want a drink, a kiss if not too much trouble and a side order of sex please!_

"She's over there." He pointed at Tasha who was slumped over in a booth.

_Geesus!_

"I'll get you a drink. Wait there, don't go anywhere. What would you like?"

"Um, Vodka and Coke please?" I said back into his ear. He smelt delightful.

"K, I'll be back. Wait there." I shivered again as I felt his lips touch my ear and I swear his hand touched my ass cheek as it slid away.

"Tash!" I said nudging her shoulder. After no reaction I did it again but harder. "Tash!"

_Oh great! She's fucked._

"Natasha! Please don't do this to me?" No! She was comatose.

"Here." He said suddenly back by my side and held out a glass to me.

_Ohh... I was way too old for these feelings._

"Thanks. Look I'm really sorry, she's passed out. I have to get her home."

"Oh." He laughed. "Like we haven't all been there."

"Sorry." I grimaced.

_This wasn't supposed to happen!_

"It's fine. Can I call you a cab?"

"No I have a car waiting. I just need to get her outside." I plunged my hand into my bag and began to page my driver.

"Drink your drink, I'll carry her out." He said scooping her up easily.

_Wow!_

I knocked back my drink. "Thank you so much. I'm going to kill her tomorrow!"

.

"Think someone will have a bad head later!" He grinned after sliding her along the back seat of the car.

"Thank you Marcus, I'm really sorry to bail." I winced.

"Hey, no worries. Get her home." He flashed a cheeky smile which showed off his teeth again.

"Bye." I lingered.

"Nice to see you again." He leaned forward and kissed my cheek softly.

_What was that aftershave he was wearing?_

"Night." I smiled and climbed into the front seat of the car. As I closed the door he tapped on the window. Steve opened it halfway for me.

Marcus rested one hand on the car roof and bend down. "Can I, er...call you?" He said bashfully.

"Um, sure." I said calmly as fireworks went off inside my stomach. He pulled his phone from his pocket and unlocked it, pressed a few buttons and handed it to me to tap in my number. I handed it back when I was done.

"Thanks" He smiled smugly.

"Classified." I said and he understood.

"Classified." He acknowledged.

"Night." I mumbled.

Steve put up my window and we pulled away.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Dirty Dawg! She got his number! *nudge nudge* *wink wink***

**I wonder what aftershave he was wearing? Dior maybe? Tash, Tash, Tash! Me thinks you may regret getting puggled! **

**He could pop me into the back of a Merc anyday! ;op**

**Thanks for sticking with me. Lots of Love. **

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	10. Chapter 10 - Contact

**Chapter 10 - Contact**

* * *

><p>Tasha let out a long groan as Steve dropped her into the bed in my guest room.<p>

"Thanks Steve." I smiled and showed him back down to the door.

"No problem Ms Austen. Goodnight." I had some pretty good people in my life that I hadn't stopped to notice before. They all bent over backwards to make my life easier. I know I paid well, but still. Nobody really liked to work, did they? I mean really liked it. "Night." I returned.

Heaving a sigh and kicking off my heels and trudged back up to Tasha. "Get your feet up pisshead!" I lifted her legs round and draped the duvet over her fully clothed body.

_Why wasn't I the one being put to bed? Why wasn't Marcus taking me to bed?_

I was way too responsible. Another thing my career put pay too - Not being able to just let my hair down, get drunk and spend the night vomiting into a bin. I wasn't going to bed yet, I wasn't even tired, and so I descended the stairs again.

Plodding to the kitchen I grabbed a wine bottle from the fridge and a glass from the drainer and headed for the lounge to flop on my sofa.

_Maybe just one drink would ease my self pity?_

Already irritated my phone ringing made me growl out loud.

_What now?_

Glancing at the display it said: Incoming call... Unknown

Not prepared to play ball with anyone at this time of the evening, I cancelled the call. "No Thank you!"

Tsskk!

I poured my wine and grabbed my bag looking for my ciggies. My phone rang again.

"What?!" I snapped answering it, seeing it was the unknown number again.

"Jen?" It was a male voice I didn't recognize.

"Who is this?" I snarled again ready to hang up.

"It's Marcus! You all right?"

_Woah!_

"Um, yes! Hi." Now I really needed a cigarette!

"I just wanted to ring to make sure you got Tasha home OK?" I heard him exhale like he was smoking. I could just see him now, the way he held it between finger and thumb.

"Jen?" He said again a little louder.

"Hmm? What?" I'd got distracted again.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have rang, I just wante..."

"No! It's fine." I cut him off. "I'm just looking for my ciggies." I rummaged some more.

"Little point without a lighter?" He chuckled.

"Yeah. Good point well made." I leant back, molding into my plush comfortable sofa.

"So how is she?" I wondered where he was talking from. It was all quiet his end. Maybe he was outside the party again having another cigarette.

"My driver helped me carry her upstairs. I chucked the duvet over her. Silly sod."

"Cool. Look I..."

"Thank you for inviting us, sorry my friend was an idiot and sorry again for bailing." I blurted out, afraid what he was about to say.

"It's OK honest." He sounded as if he was smiling.

"I'll let you get back to it then?" I didn't want to keep him from his party.

"Glad you're both OK. Night Jen."

"Night Marcus."

I clutched my phone to my chest after I'd hung up. Smiling like a dizzy schoolgirl.

.

I placed a glass of water and some Paracetamol on Tasha's nightstand. "Get up! Sam's on his way!" I shouted, making her jump and curse. Holding her head she moaned. "Oh My..."

"Nope! Even God's too busy to help you right now, ring back tomorrow!" She was way too easy to tease in this state.

Covering her ears she wailed. "No, Jen no! Stop shouting."

"Get up you drunk. I'll make you some breakfast." I chuckled.

"Ugh! No!" She protested.

"When will you learn? I had to drag your ass back home again!" I opened her curtains wide, making her cover her eyes with her hands. "How did I get here?"

"When I came back from having a ciggie you were passed out on a bench, Marcus carried you to the car and..."

She stopped me. "Wait? Marcus what?"

"He carried you to the car. Steve carried you up to bed." I tutted.

"Marcus did what, and who's Steve?" She looked confused.

"Aha you heard me right, and Steve is my driver!" I said wickedly.

"Oh no!"

"Oh yes!" I nodded grinning." Get up! Lover boy is coming to pick you up."

I left her to it and headed down to the kitchen. Feeling quite jovial I flicked on the Bose. Pop music filled my kitchen, making me jig.

_Toast! I fancied toast._

The music faded and it went to the news. A piece came on about the Trenchcoat gig last night and the name caught my attention.

"...Sources say a handful of celebs, both big and small also attended the after show party hosted by the band themselves. Stars included the Beckhams, comedienne Dawn French and even top A list movie star Jennifer Austen, who was spotted for the first time since her divorce out on the town, partying with her close friend Natasha Barrett.  
>Our Source also says they witnessed the band's lead singer Marcus Perdy bundling Austen's tipsy friend into the back of a black Mercedes during the evening causing them to leave early. Someone will be waking with a sore head this morning!"<p>

"Shit, thanks Tash!" I would be all over the papers now!

As if on cue my phone started to ring. The display read: Incoming call ... Trent

Yep! My ass was grass.

"Trent! Look I'm sorry." I started.

Sounding confused he said. "Sorry about what? Jen! What have you done?"

_Damn! It hadn't hit the States yet._

"Oh! Um. Nothing!" I tried.

_Yep, I wouldn't buy that either._

"Jen!?"

"It was a party that's all." I winced.

"Did you embarrass yourself?"

"No!"

"Did you thump anyone?"

"No!"

"Did you piss yourself or vomit in public?"

"Trent! No!"

"Then forget it! Look why I rang..." My door buzzer interrupted us.

"Wait! Hang on Trent! Someone's at my door." Lifting the vid-cam handset that showed me who was at my security gate, I saw it was Sam. "Come in Sam!" I said into it pressing the gate release. Then replaced it on its cradle "Right, I'm back Trent."

I walked through to the front hall and lifted the latch on the door for Sam.

"Who was it?" Gees, Trent was nosy.

"Tasha's fiance come to pick her sorry ass up!" I huffed.

"Sorry ass? What?"

"Don't worry about it. You were saying? Why you called." I pushed down some bread in to the toaster.

"Warner called, they wanted to know if you'd read the script?"

"Yes! The cop one. I loved it." I waved to Sam as I spoke and pointed him upstairs directing him to Tasha.

"Oh great. Good price huh?" He knew good deals when he saw them.

"Yeah! Great. Let them know I'm in and I look forward to the details." I dropped my freshly popped toast onto a plate and scraped on some butter.

"OK. Oh and Jen! Brian mailed me, Vegas premieres here in Florida on September 15th. Don't book anything!"

"Sure I'll put it in my diary before I forget. Anything else?"

"No! Just behave yourself whilst you're in London! I can't bail your ass there."

"Yes Dad!" I teased and hung up.

Taking a bite of toast I grabbed a pen and my diary from a drawer and flicked through to September."

_What day did he...?_

My phone buzzed. New Message - Trent

I opened it smiling.

Trent: September 15th!

He was a diamond. He knew me all too well, and that was scary.

Making a note of it I noticed it was my mother's birthday on the 16th. Course it was. That was her present sorted then!

.

I had a lovely long bath after Tasha and Sam had left, she wanted details of the previous evening but I talked her round to doing it another time when Sam wasn't around. I really didn't have much to tell anyway. She'd ruined that!

I tidied the bedrooms and changed the sheets. I loved clean sheets after a bath and my cleaner wasn't coming till Wednesday. Tonight was going to be an early one anyway, I could feel it.

That evening I flicked through the T.V channels in search of something decent to watch. I opted for Top Gun. I hadn't seen it for ages. I sat in my jammmies, with a bowl of popcorn between my legs and a glass of rosé in hand. Perfect evening. I'd even found my lighter, which was an added bonus.

I lit my first ciggie of the evening, the first draw felt sweet inside, calming. I blew it away and rested it in the dip of the ashtray. As I grabbed a handful of popcorn my phone buzzed.

New Message - Marcus.

_Oh Shit!_

Marcus: You still up? - I tapped a reply.

Me: Hey! Yes just watching Top Gun. How was the party? - Within seconds the reply came.

Marcus: Dull after you left. How's Tasha? - I ignored the first half of the message and replied to the latter.

Me: She's gone home with her tail between her legs. She apologizes.

I picked up my Marlborough again and took another drag, replacing it back to pop more popcorn in my mouth.

Marcus: LOL she's forgiven - Another came before I could think of a reply.

Marcus: Listen I hope I'm not jumping the gun here and feel free to tell me where to go but I was wondering if you would like to go to dinner sometime? - Another followed again.

Marcus: Please don't shoot me! :s - I laughed at his emoji.

Me: 100% for effort. I just don't like to go out a lot. Press and all.

Marcus: That's OK. I just thought I'd be brave and ask.

Then we paused, not knowing what to say, he broke the fresh ice.

Marcus: Forgive me for being presumptuous, I mean no ulterior motive, but you are welcome to come here and I'll cook. If you don't want to go out that is?

_Was I ready?_

He was certainly looking interested and he was gorgeous, but was he being honest?

_What was in it for him?_

He had his own money, so it wasn't that. I balanced that alongside the fact every time we spoke I got stirrings from within my underwear I'd not felt in years. His next text snapped me from my daze.

Marcus: I've ruined it haven't I? I'm sorry - my pause must have given him the wrong signal. So I text back quickly.

Me: Of course you haven't. I was just getting a drink. - I lied.

Marcus: Phew!

Me: Classified? - What harm could one meal do with him, right?

Marcus: Naturally. Is that a yes?

Me: When and where?

Marcus: Classified? - Good. He had humour.

Me: Naturally.

Marcus: Apartment four, Southbank Road, Kensington. Say... Eight. Tomorrow?

_Shit! He lives in an apartment! What was I doing? Was I a snob now too?  
><em>

Going to some guys place when I'd only been divorced seven months! The ripples in my tummy argued the point.

Me: Fine. See you then. Can I bring anything?

Marcus: Nope. Just yourself. Oh be sure to leave your friend at home too. - I laughed aloud at that.

Me: LOL No problem.

Marcus: Enjoy the film.

Me: I've lost track now. It was shit anyway. - Although Tom Cruise was still damn hot in it.

Marcus: I do have a habit of interrupting. Apologies.

Me: Accepted. Night x - It sent!

_Shit! I put a kiss. I didn't mean to put a kiss!_ _Argh!_

Marcus: Sweet dreams xx

"Oh my god!" I said aloud. This wasn't real. Was it? He'd sent two kisses back!

_How was this going to work? Could it work? Should I treat as a bit of fun?_

Yes. That's it. Just a bit of fun.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: We have lift off! She's got a date. Lucky Woman! Wonder how it will go? Well I know, It's already written, but you dear readers will have to wait and see. *evil laugh***

**Ongoing squidgy Hugs to Twihard till I die. Together we'll be millionairesses and find our own Marcus Perdy. (Sorry Hubbies)**

**Quick, I'll race you to Chapter 11.**

**DeathToBeReborn. xx**


	11. Chapter 11 - Date

**Chapter 11 Date  
><strong>

* * *

><p>As I stood outside his apartment block my heart rose up to my mouth. It was dark so nobody had seen me arrive, well unless the stalker paps had followed me from home. luckily I'd seen no evidence of them though.<p>

I took a deep breath and drew back the last puff of my cigarette and squashed the butt to the concreate with the flat of my heeled black stiletto. It was freezing outside.

_Why the hell did I think it would be a good idea to opt for the black dress?_

Plunging my hand in my bag I found a polo mint. I suddenly felt sick with nerves, I thought hopefully the mint would help. Pleading with myself not to throw up I pushed the button beside apartment four. 'M.P'. Lord my nails looked a fright!

_Why didn't I have a manicure?_

"Hello?" His voice made my tummy turn somersaults.

"Hi, it's Jen." I muttered awkwardly.

"Come on in. Up the stairs and on the right." He sounded happy.

The door buzzed and I gave it a shove with my shoulder. This was it; I was on my first date. The sound of my heels echoed in the stairwell making me walk on my toes, embarrassed someone would come out to see what the racket was about. I headed round to the right and found door with the number four on it and knocked.

He swished open the door, looking mighty fine. "Hey!" He was dressed casually in black jeans and a red checked flannel shirt that covered a grey tee. Great, now I was overdressed as well. His apartment was surprisingly spacious, a real rabbit warren compared to how it looked like on the outside anyway. The smell of cooking wafted up my nostrils, it smelt divine and suddenly I was starving. "Hi. Something smells good." I said stepping inside; he closed the door behind me.

"Thanks! Hope you like curry?" He smiled. "It's nearly ready. Take a seat." He motioned a hand to the black leather sofa. "Oh, thanks." I perched on the edge of it delicately.

He disappeared and I heard chinking of glasses. He reappeared with a bottle of white wine and placed the glasses on the table. Filling them both he handed me one. "You look stunning by the way." He flashed his dazzling teeth reflecting the light from the room. "I suddenly feel very overdressed." I said looking down at my dress and winced. "Too much?"

"No. No, no. I'm just a slob." He flapped the edges of the unbuttoned flannel shirt forcing the smell of his aftershave to shoot right up my nose.

_Oh god!_

Smiling he said. "I'll just go plate up."

Whilst alone I had a nosy around the room, he had lots of family pictures on the mantle and canvases hung on the wall. One caught my eye. It was a black and white one of Marcus sporting a hot model look laid in the waves on a beach somewhere. It made my tummy flutter again.

"Ready?" He said returning with two plates of steaming food. He set them down on the table.

"Nice shots!" I said pointing my glass to the canvas of him. "Ah yes! My ego shots." He winced. I flashed him a 'tell me more' look making him groan. "My older sister is a professional photographer; she thought it would be great for my portfolio. I have to confess though; it is the only one I really like of me."

"It's very nice." I grinned hoping this light didn't show my blush. "Where was it taken?" Thinking he'd say Bahamas or Jamaica.

"Southend-on-sea." He laughed.

"Oh!"

"I was freezing my bollocks off in that water!" We both creased up.

"Shall we?" He nodded his head towards the table, referred to the meal. I smiled again and took my seat.

.

.

"That was awesome!" I said patting my sated stomach. "I'm stuffed." I really needed a cigarette but didn't want to seem rude. Instead I sipped my wine politely.

"I have a small gift for you, hope you don't mind." He grinned grabbing the two plates and disappeared into the kitchen. "What?"

_No, not presents!_

He returned with a small box. (No, not that kind of box.)

I hated opening gifts, especially in front of strangers. I got embarrassed. Opening it slowly I laughed aloud. He'd given me a new lighter bearing the Trenchcoat logo on it. "Oh, perfect!" I got it out from the box and tested it. "Thank you."

"I saw it and immediately thought of you, thought it would make you smile." It certainly had.

I chuckled. "And it did, thank you so much. You shouldn't have."

"Meh! It was free mechandise. Shall we retire to the smoking lounge?" He let me lead the way again.

_Was this his way at staring at my ass in this now very tight dress?_

"Thanks for that. It was delicious." I said again retrieving my cigarette packet from my bag and offered him one, which he took.

"That's OK, thanks for coming. I must admit I was shit scared you'd tell me where to go!" He let out a nervous laugh. "Why would I do that?"  
>"Well I know things haven't been easy for you recently and I didn't want to feel I was pushing you into anything." He leaned back against the back of the sofa and placed an arm along the headrest; shifting his weight he twisted slightly facing me.<p>

Thinking how nervous I'd been before coming I smiled. "Well I did wonder what I was getting myself into, what people would think." I lit the Marlborough I had absent-mindedly been rolling between my finger and thumb then held out the flame of my new lighter to Marcus. "Cheers!" I exhaled as he pulled in deep to light his too.

After he'd lit it he said. "Do you care what people think?" Bringing his wine to his lips he swallowed a mouthful.

"Well it rules my life. I have to fight for my private life constantly."

"And yet you still accepted."

"Yes. I realized that for the last nine years I've jumped to everybody's demands, every whim. It's was about time I did something that I wanted to do. That made me happy." I shrugged my shoulders and crossed my legs feeling more at ease talking to him now.

"That sounds awful, and with a dick of a husband, that must have been a nightmare." He sneered at the mere mention of him.

"Yeah well guess my judgement on the male species isn't what I thought." I raised my glass to my lips and took a sip.

"Not all of them." He looked into his lap shyly.

"I hope not." I eyed him as he chewed the skin inside his bottom lip.

"Don't blame yourself. There is no excuse for that ever. It makes my blood boil, treating women like that."

"He manipulated me, gained my trust and screwed me over. I'm thankful to her now really. She did me a big favour."

"Inexcusable" He shook his head vigorously.

Eager to change the subject I turned it around on him. "So, how did you get into music?" I stubbed out my ciggie in the ashtray on the small oak coffee table in front of us. I don't know why I bothered smoking. It wasn't as if I enjoyed it, it was just habit I guess.

"My Dad played in a band many moons ago, so we were brought up with music constantly playing. We used to go watch him play every weekend. When I left school I got a job in a music shop in Regent Street. Many of my mates were heavily into music too and we did what a lot of kids do and started up a band. I played guitar and sang. Jimmy, who's my manager now. Saw us play and signed me up, which obviously split the band along with our friendships. But it was worth it. Three years ago Trench got our break and here we are."

"Sounds great." I grinned. "Is it wrong to say I'd never heard of you guys before Tasha dragged me to the gig?"

"No, not at all. You are a busy woman. You wouldn't be as successful as you are if you paid attention to every band that came out." He finished his cigarette now too. "What about you?" He sipped some more wine.

"Me? Oh, I always wanted to be famous since I was little. Mum made lots of videos of me following dialogue of movies. I loved drama at school and went on to study performing arts at college. Got my diploma and ended up getting a job as a runner on a T.V chat show."

"Like your friend." He interrupted.

"Yeah, we graduated together actually. She stayed on behind the camera and I left to go to Hollywood. I got some small parts as extras, and that's when my manager spotted me. Trent saw I wasn't leading my potential and landed me a bigger role in my first proper movie."

"Days of Dreams." He raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. I was terrible. I refuse to watch it now."

"Nah! I loved it. It's sat there in my DVD collection." He nodded towards his vast rack of movies.

"Oh please? Don't! You really don't strike me as a romance type though." I finished the last drop of wine watching him blush.

"This tough exterior is all false. I cry at four weddings and a funeral you know!" He held up his hands in defence, making me giggle. "How many movies have you done altogether then?"

"Six in total. The last being my biggest." I tried my best not to gloat.

"Vegas or Bust." He beamed.

"Yeah."

"I look forward to seeing it."

I cringed. "You really don't have to say that you know."

"Why not? Why wouldn't I want to see it? I love your movies."

"I guess I find it hard to believe it would interest male viewers. I see all my work as chick flicks." Greg never saw my movies. He had little interest except the pay check at the end of filming.

"Chick flicks are packed with insight into a females mind." He shrugged sneakily.

"Ahh, I see. So you pick up all your women using the scenes from chick flicks?"

"No! Yes! Well, having being single for three and a half years. I'd say I need a new avenue as that one clearly doesn't work." We both tittered.

"I have a feeling you will like certain scenes from Vegas then, if you have led a sheltered life for that long."

_Wait what the hell was I saying?_

"Yeah?" He raised an eyebrow with a cheeky lopsided grin. "Intrigued."

"I hated every minute of it. They are going to be my biggest bug bare from the whole industry!"

"Even with Tim Ford?"

I laughed aloud. "Yes."

"Answer me something? I've always wanted to know." He squeezed one eye closed curious.

"What? Do we really have sex?"

"Yeah? Cos some films I've seen they really go for it, and it looks extremely real."

"Most don't, unless its porn. I didn't. You get given modesty patches. It's up to you if you wish to use them though."

"That must take some pretty good acting then."

"They say the first is the worst, but I'm glad it's over every time. Probably like your first gig I should imagine."

"Except, thankfully I get to keep my clothes on!" We both laughed again. I finally felt calm and we were finally able to enjoy each others company. We chatted long into the night.

.

Stifling a yawn I apologized. "Oh, excuse me!"

"I'm sorry; I've kept you up late again Cinderella." He grinned shyly. "Thanks for coming round, I had fun."

"No worries, so did I. Thanks for the invite." I stood up, pushing down my dress as it had ridden up when I'd sat down.

Walking me to the door he put his hands in his pockets and looked shy and timid.

"I seriously enjoyed your company; I haven't spent so much time with a beautiful woman in a very, very long time."

Whether it was the wine hitting my lower half from standing or just his soft words, but my knees started to feel weak. Suddenly unable to cope with my weight. This was probably the most important part of the whole evening. I couldn't mess this up. Searching his eyes for words of inspiration, all I could see were sparkling green pools begging me not to leave. He reached up and lent one hand against the door frame trapping my exit.

Speaking in no more than a whisper I uttered. "Thank you for dinner." Then I did something that surprised us both. Leaning forward I placed a soft kiss on his lips. Electric sizzled through my whole body. My underwear twitched and my hands shook. Pulling back I worried I'd crossed a line far too soon.

Clearly he disagreed. A beam spread slowly across his face revealing his beautiful teeth once more. "Jen..." He began to speak before I placed a finger over his lips stopping him. "I have to go. Goodnight Marcus."

Without stopping for a reply I dipped under his arm and fled. I couldn't look back.

Because the last place I wanted to be going right now, was home.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Noooooooooo. She bolted! I think I know which picture Jen spotted. Do you? *dreamy sigh***

**Thank you Twihard till I die for Beta'ing my chapters while poorly sick. Glad they made you feel better xx**

**Still no reviews, are you lot stunned into silence? Or just waiting for the sauce to flow. Hmm?**

**You will have to read on and find out wont you?**

**Love and Peace. **

**DeathToBeReborn. xx**


	12. Chapter 12 - Bonding

**Chapter 12 - Bonding**

* * *

><p>N.B: Words in <strong>BOLD<strong> are Jen's thoughts to his words.

* * *

><p>I woke around two the next afternoon. Did mornings not exist in my life any more? I stretched out with a smile remembering my dream I had just woken from.<p>

_Slamming me against his wall, knocking off his precious picture he kissed every inch of my skin whilst holding me still with a strong fist to the neck. My breath came weak and shallow. Not by the restriction of oxygen, but by the feel of his fingers probing my sex. His clothes had disappeared. _

_**Had I done that? **_

_His deep husky tone growled out my name, my legs buckled beneath me, feeling my weakness he lifted me easily sliding me up the wall and wrapped himself in a neat parcel using my legs as paper. My hands grappled eagerly at his bulging biceps and his soft skin felt like silk against my own. _

_A hungry earthly moan escaped my lips. **Fuck, was that me?**_

_"You want me don't you Jen?" __He growled at me through gritted teeth. __**Was he nuts? Of course I bloody well did! **_

___"Yea" __I answered with a small squeak._

_ "You want me to fuck you hard?" **Er, Yes! **_

_"Here, now? Up against this wall?" **Fuck yes! **_

_He pushes two long fingers inside me, stretching me out. **Woah!**_

_"You are soaking wet Baby." **All for you Marcus. **_

_"You are a dirty bitch aren't you Jen?" **Aha! Filthy!**_

_"You want my cock?" He slips his soaking wet fingers that reek of my juices in my mouth. **What a stupid fucking question!**  
><em>

_"You taste delicious, don't you Jen?" **Do** **I? I'd prefer to taste you!  
><strong>_

_His cock fills me with one sharp movement. My eyes roll back and I enter delirium. I'm gone, floating away, off on the tide of passion...  
><em>

.

My phone brought me back to my bedroom with a buzz.

_Was I blushing? How could a dream make me blush?  
><em>

_Was it was him texting me?_

I squinted with one eye at the display.

New Message - Tasha

_Oh Thank God!_

Tasha: Hey Babes! How's things? We still haven't caught up from the other night. I need details! - Tapping in my reply, I went in search for coffee and a cigarette.

Me: I sent Marcus your apologies, he forgave you. Not much to catch up on. - I lied fluently.

Tasha: Wait! You've spoke to him since?

_Damn! Yep that wasn't as well thought out as it should have been._

Me: Yeah, he wanted to check you were OK.

_Yep turn it round on her. That's would work._

Tasha: How? Did you meet up with him or did you give him your phone number? Details woman!

Me: Phone. It's really nothing, why don't you come over for lunch? - I opted to tell her the easier option, rather then trying to explain our meal together.

Tasha: Hell! I'm on my way.

Me: OK. See you soon.

I slid my phone onto the kitchen counter, turning my attention to my grumbling stomach. Grabbing my toast I headed for the shower, desperately churning things over in my head at what the hell exactly I was going to tell Tasha.

.

My buzzer went as I fixed my hair in a messy bun on top of my head. Rushing down I saw it was Tasha so I released the gate. She'd brought bagels with her for our lunch. It would make a change from the rubbish I tried to make anyway.

"Right! Spill!" She squealed excitedly as soon as she slammed my front door. Running in she gave me a huge hug and grabbed a glass of water.

"There's nothing to tell!" I reiterated.

"There must be something! What happened at the party?"

"I came back from having a ciggie and you were passed out. He put you in the car. That was it." I shrugged.

"And you said he forgave me?" She was wiggling her legs with anticipation.

"Yeah. We swapped numbers."

"And?"

_ Was I that transparent?_

"OK, we had dinner." I held out my hands, attempting to sound blasé.

"What the... Dinner?! When? Where?" Her mouth fell agape.

I was stuck in between a rock and a hard place. "Look this can't go any further. Not even Sam, not yet?"

"I swear to god!" She made a cross on her chest with her finger. "I won't say anything. This is so exciting!" She clapped her hands with glee.

"Obviously we couldn't meet in a restaurant, so I went to his."

"No!" Her shock face soon returned and her voice went high. "His house?!"

"Please, you swear. This was important to me."

She pulled me in close. "You know I will always support you Babes, and I'm really pleased for you. Hell! Marcus Perdy!?"

"It's only one date, and extremely early days. Please don't make more of this then it actually is."

"Did you kiss? Did you shag him?"

There was no way she was getting that type of information out of me. "No! Tasha!"

She giggled. "Jen, stop living in the dark ages! Most people..."

I had to interrupt that. "I am not most people! Get your mind out the damn gutter, you tramp!"

"I can't help it. You must have kissed..surely?" She searched my eyes because she knew they couldn't lie. I didn't need to reply. She saw it.

"I bloody knew it!"

.

.

It was three more days before I heard from Marcus. In a way I had been disheartened because of the way our evening together had ended, but in another I was glad. It didn't make me look too keen.

_What if I'd read too much into it and he just wanted a casual thing?  
><em>

I didn't want to look needy. I had my career to think of. I hadn't the nerve to text him first. I swore I'd wait for him to make the first move.

_But what if he was thinking the same and waiting for me to text him?  
><em>

I'd not dated for years.

_Why was it so hard?_

_ I'm sure It hadn't been this hard before?_

My phone buzzed later that afternoon while I was reading the latest copy of O.K that my housekeeper had left me on my kitchen counter. Deeply engrossed in an interview with a top hot pop star, I flippantly glanced at who the message was from. When I saw it was from him I hate to double take. He'd finally text me.

New Message - Marcus

Tentatively I opened it.

Marcus: I'm sorry I ruined the evening the other night. I really don't usually invite people back to my apartment, but I had a really great evening. Thanks again. All details will remain classified.

I raised my eyebrows, confused as to whether he wanted to see me again or not. He'd not made that clear. Was this his thanks but no thanks text? So I replied just as vague, hoping for some clarity.

Me: No apologies needed, I had a great night too. - Yeah that would do, keep it simple.

I didn't have to wait long for his return message.

Marcus: Oh thank god, it has taken me three days to pluck up the courage to send that message. How are you?

I laughed to myself imagining him hovering over his phone deciding whether or not to send it.

Me: I ran out of courage a long time ago. I'm fine...Now.

_Now? Was that necessary? Oh Shit! Damn, I'd sent it!_

Marcus: I was so sure I'd ruined it.

_Phew! He didn't ask about the now bit._

Me: You didn't ruin anything. I was the one who kissed you, remember? Dinner was amazing. I just couldn't stay.

I grimaced, wondering how he'd take the last bit.

Marcus: No of course not. I wouldn't expect you too. I understand, but I'd love to repeat the meal part sometime?

_He wanted to see me again!_

Me: O.K. But this time you come here? If you want to that is?

Marcus: Are you sure?

_Don't ask me if I'm sure. Of course I'm not sure! I'm female!_

Me: I'm sure! But I must warn you I can't cook.

Marcus: Hmm, I wouldn't want food poisoning..I'd better cook. You sure it's OK?

_Don't ask me again! I could change my mind!_

Me: Yes.

My heart flipped as I send it.

Marcus: When and where?

Me: Classified. Hawkridge House, N15. Near the hospital. Would tonight suit?

Marcus: Classified, I understand. Tonight sounds awesome. Sixish?

Me: Sounds perfect. See you then.

Marcus: Cool, look forward to it.

_OK. Six o clock!_

I checked the time on my phone. Two fifteen. Shit! I only had four hours to prepare.

.

.

My heart skipped three beats when the gate buzzer went off. Taking a huge deep breath I picked up the handset. "Hello?"

"Er, Hi. It's Marcus." I could see that by the small screen in my hand. Even in the fading light he looked delicious. I pushed the gate release.

I checked my reflection one last time and went to meet him at the door. He trudged up the two small steps to my front door with an armfuls of grocery bags. "Hey." He said with a sideways smile. "Here, let me help." I took a bag freeing up one of his arms. "Oh thanks."

_Great, he was wearing a suit! _

Not that I complained, he wore it well. He wore everything well. I was peeved because he dressed casual last time, I had done the same this time.

"Nice suit. Come in" I raised an eyebrow beckoning him inside.

_Nice? It wasn't nice, it was smoking hot_!

"Too much?" He winced eying my casual attire. "I knew I should have wore the jeans."

"No, it's not too much, I Just wasn't expecting formal, because of last time. Now I feel very under-dressed." I laughed nervously.

"Nope, you definitely don't look under-dressed. Everything's, um..covered." His eyes ran down over my figure, making the heat rise into my cheeks.

He must have noticed my embarrassment because he changed the subject quickly. Glancing around the hall he smiled. "Nice house!"

"Oh. Thank you. Yeah I like this one." I smiled looking around the decor, like I'd never seen it before.

"This one?" He gaffawed.

"Er, yeah. I have, well I had three. This ones my favourite, although It does feel too big sometimes." I turned to lead him through the hall and into the large bright white-toned kitchen.

"You said 'had' three?" He started to unpack the bags onto the kitchen counter.

"Yeah. I lost the one in France in the divorce." I shocked myself how easy that came out my mouth.

"Oh, I'm sorry." He said pausing.

"Don't be. I hated it. It was far too old for my liking. Greg picked it. His name was on the deed, so he was welcome to it." I shrugged.

"And the third one?" He continued to lay out the ingredients for dinner.

"New York." I walked to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of white wine.

"New York? Wow! I've always wanted to go to there. It sounds amazing. I suppose I should have guessed with all the work you do out there."

"Vegas is being shot in Florida. So I still have to live out of a hotel. Do you want wine or beer?"

"Oh, beer please? Can't imaging living in a hotel for longer than a week or two."

I returned the wine to the fridge and grabbed two beers. "No, it sucks!"

A huge grin spread over his face, which puzzled me. "What?"

"You drink beer?" The smile remained.

"Should I not?" I grinned back.

"I guess when I imagine you drinking I see champagne and an expensive Rioja, with an occasional Vodka." He was referring to what I requested at the tour wrap party. Turning he carried the veg to the sink to wash.

"I do." I shrugged. "But I also drink beer."

"O..Kay. Is risotto all right?"

"Mmm..Sounds yummy. Do you cook a lot? I mean, not just micro meals." I got out a wooden chopping board for him and put it on the counter.

He shook the loose water from the veg and returned to chop it up. "I don't do ding ding food at all! Fresh all the way."

"Wow!" I was shocked.

"What?" Now he looked confused.

"I guess we all go by stereotypes. You don't look like you would be the type to cook fancy meals." I opened a few of my cupboards to find some pans. I'd not needed them myself before, Greg had always cooked when he was here. Other than that I lived on toast.

"Touchee! I can however, tell you don't cook much." He raised an eyebrow and flashed his teeth as he chopped referring to my clattering about looking for utensils.

"Um, no." I blushed.

_Damn him!_

I found some pans and put them out on the hob for him.

"Hence why you're so skinny I suspect."

"I am not skinny." I huffed.

"You are too. You need feeding up."

"Is this our first argument?" I couldn't help myself. It made him stop and grin at me. He couldn't think of a reply, so he just took a swig from his beer bottle and carried on with dinner.

"Do I make you uncomfortable by watching you?" I swung my knees side to side as I sat swinging on a stool up to the counter he was working on.

"No, not at all." He said without looking up.

My phone interrupted us.

Incoming Call - Tasha.

"Hi Babe." I said Into the mouthpiece. I gestured to Marcus. "Sorry!"

"That's OK." He smiled.

Tasha heard him. "Who's that? You got someone there?" She gasped. "Is it..Marcus?"

"Yeah!" I said casually swinging round turning my back to him.

"No way! Second date! Is he near you? Does he smell nice?" Good job my back was to him, he wouldn't be able to see my flushed cheeks.

"Yes." I nodded cryptically. I could hear sizzling from behind me, so I guessed he was busying himself.

"What's he wearing? Oh I guess you can't say. Get a picture for me. Are you gonna shag him tonight?"

_Woah!_

"All right, if that's all, I really have to go." She was not getting that type of information either.

"No! Jennifer! Don't you dare hang up on me! What's he doing?" She tried some more.

"OK then, I'll pencil you in for Wednesday, byeee!" I said ending the call while she continued to rant on.

Swinging around to face him again, I sighed inwardly. He was turned to the hob with his back to me, completely unaware of my strange call to my weird friend.

_Phew!_

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><p><strong>AN: Well, well, well! A second date. He's single, smokin' hot and a domestic God! Could only happen in stories. **

**Huge thanks to Twihard till I die for beta'ing. She will be publishing soon. *Cheesy Grin***

**Love and Hugs **

**DeathToBeReborn. xx**


	13. Chapter 13 - Piano

**Chapter 13 - Piano**

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><p>We ate our meal in silence, I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. But the one thing I was sure of was his cooking skills. They were amazing. Dinner was divine. Stuffing in my last mouthful I dropped my cutlery onto my plate with a content look on my face as I chewed. After I'd swallowed I sighed. "My god man, you can cook!" He swigged his beer washing down his mouthful. "Thanks!"<p>

"I mean it, you really 'oughta do that more often, it's nearly as good as your singing."

He laughed loudly "Now that's embarrassing!"

_Yep. He was blushing now._

"Why?" I teased.

"I don't know. Watching me cook and eating it somehow doesn't bother me, but liking my singing does somehow." He cringed.

"Hey! Don't put yourself down. You just played to a packed out arena tour. That says a lot." I swigged my beer.

"No that says the band drowns out my bad vocals." He argued.

"Rubbish, you have a great voice. I won't except anything less. it's raspy, sexy."

_Oh Jen! Whoopsie!_

Marcus just laughed again as his cheeks got redder.

"OK, maybe not the best review, but I really like it. I bet I could pick you out of a line up of great singers. It's very unique."

He nodded "Lots say that actually, so you have a toned ear. I just lose myself when I sing. When I hear it back, it really doesn't sound like me."

"Just like acting." I agreed, collecting our plates and taking them to the sink.

He spoke strongly, so I would hear. "So this is where it went wrong last time."

"It didn't go wrong." I returned to my seat.

"Felt like it did. You ran out on me." He looked down at his hands shyly.

"It was late." I said truthfully.

"Well it's not late now." His eyes looked back up at me, while his head remained dipped.

_What did he mean by that?_

"Hmm, what do you want to do then?" Was I could think of to say back to him. I swallowed hard.

Lots of thoughts rushed through my head as to how he could answer.

_Clear this counter with one sweep of the arm, rip off your clothes and fuck you hard on it? Then sweep you into my arms and carry you to bed? Lick you all over until you scream my name in ecstasy?_

I felt my cheeks redden, giving me away.

"Well I guess I should do the polite thing and offer to do the dishes." I exhaled with gusto. Unaware I was even holding my breath. It broke the tense silence and we just laughed.

.

After we'd cleaned up we decided to watch a movie. I had a copy of the latest Bond movie, we decided on that. We grabbed a few more beers and settled on the sofa. I pulled up my feet beside me to get comfortable. He molded back into it and rested his arm along the back.

About 20 minutes in my phone buzzed. Seeing it was from Tasha I ignored it.

"You not gonna answer that?" He said looking over to me.

"Nope! It was Tash, she can wait." I said not taking my eyes from the screen.

"Oh." He said. He probably figured out what she wanted anyway, I thought. After a paused he said "Can I use your bathroom?"

"Yeah sure, through there on the right." I said pointing to the hallway.

"Thanks." He rose from the chair and followed my hand signals.

Now he'd gone I picked my phone back up and opened Tasha's message.

New Message - Tasha

Tasha: How's it going? Have you humped him yet?

Me: No! It's going fine. Go away.

Tasha: Details! ASAP!

Me: I said go away. x

Tasha: Give him one from me. x

I chuckled aloud and tossed my phone back on the coffee table in front of where we sat. Suddenly I heard soft music playing, sounded like the piano. I rose from the chair and followed the sound. Marcus was sat at my piano, playing the most tantilising tune I'd ever heard.

"There is no end to your talents Mr Perdy." I smirked.

"She's a little out of tune. Sorry I couldn't resist."

_How did he talk, look at me and play at the same time? Clever._

"No, play away, by all means. It hasn't been played with for a long time."

_Huh! Like a lot of things in this house._

"You don't play much?" He said pausing playing.

"I don't play at all." I confessed.

"What? Not at all? Why on earth is it here then?" He looked shocked.

"Greg played some. Said he was going to teach me. He never got round to it."

_Again, like most things in this house!_

He started playing another beautiful tune.

"I didn't know it played such lovely music. It didn't sound like that when I tried." I chuckled.

"I can teach you if you want?"

_Oh Yeahh Baby! ..Get your mind out the gutter Jen!_

"Lord no! I'm not any good with music _at all_!" I shook my head.

"Don't be silly anyone can play." That crooked smile returned and his eyes sparkled as they looked at me.

"Not me. I'm best at listening to it, believe me."

He began a new tune, one I recognized. One of his own. He began singing along to it.

How surreal was this. Marcus Perdy playing my piano and singing to me.

_Tasha would piss her pants!_

I stood there absorbing the music, witnessing him getting lost in amongst the words. He really was fantastic.

Rapidly, all too soon the evening came to its end. I leaned against the piano where he sat and thanked him for playing for me.

"That's OK, my pleasure." He sighed softly.

"Thank you for cooking too." I added.

"That was also a pleasure." He rose silently from the stool and placed down the lid gently over the keys. I looked down and pushed my naked toes deep into the shag-pile, feeling suddenly shy.

" Jen, I had a wonderful evening, and.." He paused making me look up into his emerald glinting eyes. "..I really like you."

"Thank you for coming." My voice was all but a wobbly whisper, making me feel sixteen again.

"Why does it feel like we are teenagers here?" He said awkwardly.

"I was just thinking that myself." I sniggered.

He held out his hand and I took it, pulling me closer to him he bit his lip nervously. Taking my other hand too he swung them between us. "Look, I'm not looking for information or money, gees I have my own. I just.."

"What are you looking for Marcus?" I felt him hitch his breath as I said his name.

_Did I have that effect on him too?_

He took a deep breath and blew it out. He let go of my hands to slip them through to my waist and lowered them to rest on my ass cheeks, pulling me in till our bodies met. Automatically I lifted my arms and linked them behind his neck.

With his face now inches from mine he whispered "You."

My eyes locked onto his and I began to move in for a kiss, until he pulled his head back slightly away from me.

_Shit! He wasn't ready for the kiss!_

"Oh, sorry! I thought.." I withdrew my arms and began to move back but he said. "No.." and moved my hands back around his neck. ".. I wasn't refusing you." He was grinning again and pulled me close once more. I said nothing. I'd suddenly forgotten how to speak. "I was going to say..I can't keep walking away from you Jen. I don't want too. I think about you constantly. I wake from dreaming about you with a...a...in a state!" He blushed, but continued. "I don't know what I can give you?"

"I don't want anything, I don't ask for anything." I sighed I had to get this out.

_Yes I do...Sex, and lots of it!_

"I think about you too. A lot!" I laughed the last bit out.

That was it, he'd heard enough. He rammed his face hard against mine, suddenly we were kissing, deeply, lustfully. My vision went black like the late evening sky. It must have been bonfire night too, because I started to see fireworks shoot past my eyelids. Colour filled explosions of pure passion. It left us both panting as we parted, but he managed to say. "I don't want to go."

I wanted more too, so I said the first thing that came Into my mind. "Then don't!"

He smiled and let out a small "hhhh" sound, like he couldn't believe I wanted the same thing, a sound of relief.

Within seconds we were locked together again. He bent slightly and picked up my legs and wrapped them tightly around his hips.

_Shit! That wasn't a dream last night! It was a fucking premonition!_

Walking forwards, he slammed me against against my hallway wall eager to gain some resistance. My head span and my heart thumped. I'd not experience urgency like this before in my entire life. The passion overload made me giddy. Thank goodness he was holding me up right then, as my legs had turned to jelly. Corny I know, but they had.

He pulled away from my lips just long enough to breathlessly say "Bedroom!" Exactly one second later I panted. "Here!"

He didn't need telling twice. Pushing me harder to the wall with his torso, he let my legs drop so he could slide both hands up my thighs under my skirt and hooked two fingers either side of my hips into the elastic of my knickers, with one swift move he dispensed of the tiny slither of my thong.

"Shit!" He breathed hard as he dealt with his belt and fastenings on his trousers. I watched panting as he dropped his trousers and boxers in once foul swoop. Not even bothering to waste time removing his shirt he ripped open a condom packet and slid the content on himself. At least he came prepared.

He lifted me again and I clung to his neck, the kissing restarted and I swore loudly as he slid straight into me. I clawed my fingers through his tousled hair gripping clumps by the roots. Tilting my head to the side I gained greater depth in the kiss. He pulled away from my mouth to curse.

"Oh Fuck!" He growled as he continued to pound into me. He turned the attention of his mouth to my neck. Planting tiny kisses all over my sensitive skin. My nails dug deeper into his sweaty back, pawing him closer, not that it was possible to get any closer than he was right now. The pace increased along with my heartbeat. Until I could take it no longer, my eyes rolled back into my head, the fireworks built into their crescendo. With a loud cry we climaxed together. He rested his head against the wall beside me as we came back to earth. He didn't let me go, till we both regained some composure.

"Fuck woman you are Incredible!" He hummed adjusting his dress. "You don't know how long I've been waiting to do that!"

"Ditto and you're not so bad yourself!" I shimmied my skirt down covering my post random sex embarrassment.

"I'll, just go get rid of this." He said holding the used contraceptive.

That never happened in the films either. Quickly I ran my finger though my hair, the 'Just fucked' style wasn't attractive. He returned looking slightly embarrassed and with messy hair too.

"That was pudding by the way." He smiled breaking the ice, coming over to hug me again. I sighed, happy, sated and wrapped in his arms. "I like pudding."

He chuckled and placed a kiss on my forehead. "I meant what I said before by the way, by the piano."

I ran my hands up and down his shirt back, pulling back to look at his eyes. "Me too." I smiled happily.

"So what we going to do about it?"

"Don't go." I said and pleading with him inside my head.

He must have heard it, because that night I lay in his arms; cosy in my king size, and with a stupid smile on my face.

I didn't dream about him that night. I didn't have to, he was right there next to me. Sleeping like a baby.

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><p><strong>AN: OOoooh sauce. Nice! I ever so slightly like Marcus Perdy. *blush***

**Thank you to my fellow Perdy lover Twihard till I die. I'm glad he make you feel better ;o)**

**Still a little dry on reviews. Come on, tell me what you think. I'm dying to know. xx**

**Quickly onto Chapter 14 then? Lead on McDuff! **

**DeathToBeReborn. xx**


	14. Chapter 14 - Bed and Breakfast

**Chapter 14 - Breakfast in bed**

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><p>When I woke, I stretched out and yawned. Had I dreamt it last night too? I didn't have to wait long for my answer when Marcus returned to my room in just his boxers, carrying a tray. "Breakfast?" He said smiling.<p>

"What are you doing?" I asked pushing myself up to sit, stupidly clasping my duvet around my naked torso.

"Making breakfast, for you." His tone was strong. "I need to feed you up!"

"No you don't!" I scoffed. "Besides the film industry don't give work to fat actresses."

"Rubbish, you are a long way off that and I wanted too." He placed the tray over my lap. Toast and some sort of cereal sat on the tray next to a glass of water.

"What's that? Vodka?" I probed the glass cheekily.

"No! It's water. It's good for you!" He scolded.

"But I drink coffee in the mornings." I whined like a child.

He tittered. "You can have coffee after the water." and wagged his finger at me. "Oh and I think your housekeeper just arrived."

"Oh!" I chuckled. "Whoops!"

"I think she nearly died of heart failure." He nicked a triangle of toast from my tray and bit into it. With a mouthful he mumbled. "Look, I have to go home to change. When can I see you again?"

"Um, I think I have a meeting today with my lawyer, you can stop by tonight if you want?" I sipped my water and made a disgusted face.

Shaking his head he said. "Can't. I have a small charity gig tonight with the guys. I can't wriggle out of it I'm afraid."

I tried my best to force the painful memories of Greg always fobbing me off to the back of my mind. I knew Marcus was probably telling the truth, but it still hurt like hell.

"Oh." My head dropped to lap.

"Hey!" He lifted my chin with his knuckle. "I'm not him and would love nothing more than to spend time with you again. Please know that?"

"I do." Didn't mean I had to like it though.

"I would ask you to come with me. But I know it's too early for that." He tweaked my nose playfully. "I don't want you to think I fuck and run Jen. It's not my style. I meant what I said, I really like you."

I just smiled as my reply and judging by the way we spent four hours exploring each other last night. I knew.

He leaned forward and kissed me on my lips, causing me to inhale deeply. His morning aroma smelt of toast and fresh cigarette smoke.

_ Great! Now I want one_!

"I have to go." His words were soft as if to lighten the blow.

"OK" I sighed. He quietly got dressed and sat on the bed to tie his shoes. When he was done he scooted up the bed beside me. "You really don't know how difficult this is leaving you here naked."

"Don't call me, I'll call you right?" I shrugged, desperate to hide my hurt.

"Oh I will be calling you, don't you worry about that...later." He cupped my face in his hands and kissed me gently. So soft I hardly felt it. With another kiss on the forehead, he rose to his feet and looked back when he reached the door with a shy grin. "Thank you," and he was gone.

He'd cast his spell. Enpowered me, he'd driven me to beyond my wildest dreams and now I was left reeling, wondering about when exactly he would return.

I finished my toast, but passed on the water, it tasted foul. Flicking back the duvet I popped my head through my bedroom door to say hi to my housekeeper and headed for the shower. Perhaps if I washed off the scent of his aftershave I wouldn't miss him so much?

After my shower, I checked my diary. I did have a meeting, penciled in for 20 minutes time. Rushing to get dressed I made it out the door as my car pulled up to the gate.

The meeting went OK. The divorce was all settled finally and my estate was safe from his filthy hands. We drafted up new contracts and I re-did my will. Three hours later I left the stuffy solicitors office and headed home. I turfed out my bag for a cigarette, but couldn't find any. "Typical!" I said irritated. I leaned forward to speak to my driver. "Steve can we stop at a newsagents, I need some ciggies."

"Sure thing!" He said cheerily.

_How come he was always cheerful?_

It must be the most boring job ever to'ing and fro'ing ferrying me around, yet he always seemed only too happy to do it.

We pulled up outside a small shop and I let myself out. I picked up a newspaper with an interesting headline and a magazine caught my eye on the shelf.

_Clever how they did that?_

I grabbed that one too and placed it on the counter. "Twenty Marlbrough light please?" The assistant grabbed a packet and rung up the total. "Thanks." I said smiling after I paid.

Returning to my car I flicked through the magazine straight to the interview. 'Trenchcoat Revealed' It read.

There were some great pictures of them all; particularly Marcus, although I was biased. It reminded me of the canvas shot on his wall in his apartment. Thinking about it made me chuckle. The question about girlfriends stood out to me as well. Marcus had replied.

_"No, there is nobody in my life at the moment, but you never know when love can surprise you. She may just be waiting just around the corner."_

**_You bet ya! _**

.

With my meeting done and my housekeeper gone. I flicked through the screenplay of the movie Trent had me in mind for. It sounded great. I'd never done a cop movie before, it was a little bit different to the chick flicks I'd done up till now. I groaned aloud when I got to a love scene, but all in all it looked a great movie to do and secretly I was excited to think I'd be wearing a cop outfit. I quite fancied that, maybe it was the dom in me fighting to get out.

After I'd finished reading I looked around for something else to do, I was bored. I rang my mother, she was fine. She brought me all up to date on the gossip about Mr Finchly across the street and that Dr Jenkins had finally retired. I loved my mother. The 'curtain twitcher' of London town, my father used to call her. He was right.

After our call I spotted my piano and a gleam in my eye, I padded over to it remembering the sounds Marcus had made come from it. He made it look so easy.

_Couldn't be that hard, right?_

I sat on the stool and lifted the lid uncovering the keys. Pressing a few together I tried to replicate his tune. No! It definitely didn't sound like that last night.

My phone ringtone broke the awful din. Pulling it from my pocket I saw it was Marcus.

New Message - Marcus

Marcus: How did the meeting go? I immediately thought how thoughtful that was, being that Greg had never interested in what went on in my life whatsoever. I tapped back smiling.

Me: Boring!

Marcus: Aw. You should have come home with me.

Me: It needed to be done. Still all sorted now though.

Marcus: I'm heading out to the gig soon. Oh I forgot to mention. It's on T.V tonight at eight, channel 10. If you can't be here, maybe you'd like to watch it?

Me: Oh great. Yes I will. Hey! I read an interesting article about you today.

Marcus: Oh really? Which one? We've done a few recently.

Me: Chat Women. Trenchcoat featured in it.

Marcus: Oh yeah, they took some great shots. Tez loved his leathers on the bike picture.

Me: Pity you didn't draw that straw! I'm sat at the piano right now, thinking about last night.

Marcus: Inspired you did I? You like leather huh?

Me: Hardly, I can't make it sound like you did. Um...Maybe?

Marcus: It takes patience and practice. I'll have to remember that! Mental note added.

Me: Don't think I have time for either.

Marcus: What leathers and piano playing?

Me: No! Patience and practice. Leather, I can do.

Marcus: Babe, I have to go. Sorry. Just wanted to see how the meeting went and to tell you I'm missing you, last night was just perfect.

_He called me Babe!_

I frowned as I typed.

Me: Missing you too. It was very perfect. Have a great gig.

Marcus: I will. I'll ring you later.

Me: OK. Bye.

_How was this going to work?_

_How would this pan out?_

_Could we really become a couple?_

I had to go back to New York soon. I sure felt like I wanted to see him more regularly, but how? I shook my head, shaking it from my mind, I couldn't think about that right now. It was spoiling my happiness.

Tasha rang eager for information, she tried to wheedle from me and she failed. I couldn't let anyone into our private life. Not even Tasha. She'd guessed of course, but I did my best not to confirm anything. Marcus and I had promised.

It was another thing we'd have to discuss. If and when we would go public. I knew it would only be a matter of time before the press found out, but whether we announced it as 'friends' or 'a couple', still was left to be decided.

I had exactly one month left in London, before I had to return to the U.S. The preliminary meetings for the new movie began in October. So it wasn't worth coming home after the premiere's.

_ Were we just being foolish to think this would even work?  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** **So he stayed the night...wooooooohooooooo! I like Mr Perdy so much already! *dreamy sigh***

**Wonder what happens next? Read on and you will see! **

**DeathToBeReborn xxx**


	15. Chapter 15 - Spreadsheets

**Chapter 15 - Spread sheet.**

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><p>Grabbing a bottle of red from the rack and a glass from the cupboard, I settled down on my sofa ready to watch 'Trenchcoat'.<p>

Turning it to channel 10 some sit-com was on, it wasn't really my type of program but I watched it anyway.

At just after eight, they were introduced. My heart skipped as they came on stage. I felt like a giddy schoolgirl again. Watching how he gripped the microphone and how his long fingers reached around it. I could feel his hands on me again, touching my skin. Seeing how his lips moved reminded me of how soft they had been pressed into my neck, his mossy green eyes burned like lasers through my TV screen sending tingles into my underwear, but the biggest feeling I had, was pride. I was extremely proud, of all of them really. They sounded great and the fact they were doing it all for charity was just amazing.

The gig finished all too quickly for me and I pined for more of him when it ended. Within minutes my phone began to ring.

Incoming call - Marcus. Flashed up on the screen.

"Hey you!" I grinned like a pixie. "You were _fantastic_!"

"Hey!" He sounded happy; a bit out of breath and a little hoarse, which didn't help much with the pull in my lower belly.

_Geesus, he sounded hot!_

"You watched then?"

"Of course I bloody well did! It was awesome!"

"Ah...You're just trying to boost my ego again aren't you?" It sounded if he was grinning.

_Oh yes, and more than your ego Marcus Perdy!_

"You love it! Don't deny it!" I teased.

"Oh yeah? Says who?" He exhaled a long breath. He was smoking by the sounds of it.

"Says a good lady friend of yours, fantastic actress and a body to die for but I hear she has a weakness for cute vocalists. So I'm not sure how credible it is." I boosted my own ego to level it out a little and he was cute, so I wasn't lying.

"Oh yes! I know the one you mean. She wasn't acting all that well last night though, if I recall?"

_Too fucking right I wasn't!_

"Hmm. She maybe a better actress then you think?" I sipped my wine flirtatiously.

"Nah! I think I got her sussed. She's putty in my hands." He chuckled.

_What wouldn't be putty in those delicious hands of his?_

"Ah, I think you maybe right there. Those are indeed lethal hands." I confirmed.

"Look, I'm outta here soon and I was wondering if I could maybe come round?" His voice wavered up at the last word.

_Shit!_

I looked down at my slobbish clothes I had on, but my brain decided for me anyway. "Of course you can, missing me already huh?"

"You bet I am!" His voice sounded low and masculine which made my nether regions twitch again in response.

_How did he do that just over the phone?_

"I'll be about 45 minutes, traffic dependent."

"OK." My voice wavered a little and I was already on my feet. Up the stairs, on my way up to the shower.

_Just in case, of course!_

.

My gate buzzer went off about an hour later. My heart skipped again.

_Would it ever stop doing that?_

Lifting the handset I saw him standing there, so I pressed the release button to let him through. I skipped to my door to wait for him there.

He was still wearing his stage clothes, and looked a little sweaty but sexy as hell as he met me at the door. I launched myself straight into his arms on tip toes and kissed him. As I clung to his damp neck as he picked me up and and carried me inside, closing the door with his foot behind him.

"Wow! Now that's a welcome!" He gave me a lopsided smirk with surprise in his eyes. "Sorry I'm late, traffic was bad coming out the venue." He placed me back down to the floor. "Forgiven." I grinned and bit my bottom lip drawing him in. Unable to resist, he picked me back up and scooped up my legs round him.

_This was where I liked to be, wrapped around him._

His mouth found mine and his hands wandered finding my ass cheeks. He expelled a small whine into my mouth as he discovered that I wasn't wearing anything under my night shirt. I pulled back to see his reaction and a glint sparkled in my eyes as I saw his realization.

"Shit!" He groaned. "Ms Austen? I do believe you seem to be missing your underwear?" I felt his thumbs run lightly over my skin as he held me securely.

"That's not all I'm missing." I teased going in for the kill.

_Oh yeah! Marcus Perdy, you're all mine!_

Reclaiming his mouth I closed my eyes and tilted my head to the right, I needed to feel depth.

He must have been walking as we kissed, because when I opened them again we were up against the kitchen breakfast bar. He sat me upon it and broke the kiss.

"I need a shower before I ravish you Ms Austen!"

_No way was he going anywhere but between my legs right now._

"Na-ah!" I growled. "Can't wait that long!"

My eyes fixated onto his, pleading him to take me; right there, right then. I bit my lip, which successfully tipped the scales in my favour. I had him right where I wanted him.

He flung off his shirt with gusto and I pulled his over his head. He simultaneously undid his jeans and he stepped down the back of his shoes releasing his feet from them. Shaking the denim free from his legs along with his boxers, his impressive length sprang free. Stepping forward he kissed me hard reaching behind to sweep my script and paperwork off the counter in one fouls swoop. I lowered myself down to the marble, feeling the cold surface against my back made me gasp. I bend up my knees as he grasped me by the hips, pulling me towards him with a hunger in his eyes.

Running his hands from my feet up past my knees they traveled fast up my to my thighs. He followed the path of his hands with his mouth, placing small kisses on my inner thighs before he finally found his goal. I cried out loud as he pleasured me with his tongue. I glanced down to see his eyes glinting up at me, the tables had turned just as quick because now he had _me_ exactly where he wanted me. In heaven. His tongue danced as my heart pounded. My spine involuntary arched and I gripped the sides of the counter begging for some resistance. I was almost disappointed my end came so quickly, I was enjoying it far too much. Explosive spasms raged through my whole body over and over again, leaving me shamelessly convulsing on the marble.

"Fuck!" I breathed hard.

Retracing his path back up my thighs he chuckled greedily. After pulling me towards him some more, I heard the familiar rip of a small silver packet. Just as my composure felt earth, it took off again as he slid into me. He was careful not to hurt and started slowly, despite me being extremely ready. Small groans escaped his mouth as he rhythm steadied and gradually began to build. He cursed repeatedly feeling his delirium overshadow his self control. Sweat beaded on his forehead. Relaxing, I allowed him my body, to please him any way he saw fit. I watched his face as he floated away in his own small moment of paradise.

_This man was beautiful in all ways possible. Was this really happening? On my own kitchen counter? Or was I on something harder than a few Valium?_

His eyes screwed up and he yelled as he came. "Shit!" He growled through his teeth as I felt him pulse inside of me.

Pulling free he staggered back, knocking against the fridge. He held out his hand in the gentlemanly fashion to help me down. My legs felt wobbly too, I don't mind admitting. "Yep!" He panted, pulling me into his arms. "I was right about you the first time!"

"What's that?" I grinned.

"You are incredible!" He laughed smiling and sedate.

"Am I?" I strengthened my embrace, hugging him tighter. "I'm just me."

"Yes! You have no idea..." He puffed out a deep breath. "..and right now...it's time for that shower!" He bent low and scooped me up and within a heartbeat we were headed upstairs.

_Oh shit! Again?!_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Man he has some stamia! A gig and multiple sex sessions! Wonder where I could get one of them? Jen's a very lucky lady indeedy do!**

**Thanks for sticking by me. A few have said they like this story. What are your feelings on it? Any particular route you'd want it to go? Let me know. x**

**Thanks to my wonderful supportive beta Twihard till I die. I love that you love my work. Cant wait to get your story up and running. xx**

**Love and Big squishy hugs **

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	16. Chapter 16 - Regret

**Chapter 16 - Regret**

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><p>As the morning brightness hit my eyes, I turned my head to look at him. He lay there still fast asleep. I cast my eyes over the beautiful man that laid next to me. His hair was all messed up, but he looked so peaceful. I dared not move, just so I could stare a little longer, secretly hoping this would happen a lot more often. Breathing a happy contented sigh, I couldn't help but grin.<p>

As if he knew I was watching him, his eyes fluttered and opened slowly. As soon as they focused on me he beamed and muttered softly "Hey" with a slight morning croak. "Hey yourself." I replied back.

"Something amusing?"

_Oh no! Just sexy as hell!_

"Nope!" I looked like the cat that got the proverbial cream.

"What you grinning at then?" He rolled onto his back and stretched out.

"I guess I'm just happy to wake up to a beautiful man in my bed." I slid closer and he lifted his arm so I could rest my head on his shoulder.

_Don't blush, don't blush!_

"How long have you been awake?"

"A while. I was watching you sleep." He squeezed me tight by my shoulder and kissed my forehead.

"Was I snoring? My throats a bit sore." He groaned.

"I don't think so. Maybe It's me making you ill?" I raised my head to look at him again. Letting it soak in I'd woken like this for the second morning on the trot. Something that didn't even happen in my marriage.

"I don't think I could ever get sick of anything associated with you." He grinned showing me his perfect teeth.

Resting my head back on his chest I said. "Oh I can think of a few."

"Oh yeah? Like what?" he tittered with humour in his voice.

"I can't cook; I'm a slob, I'm a frequent flyer, I hate, no! _Detest_ water. I like the loo roll facing outwards; I watch trashy movies, I smoke.."

"Ah well I agree with that one." He interrupted.

I continued. "I eat little, and fart a lot. I have thousands of meetings, drink way too much wine and snog men for money while being filmed."

He chuckled aloud and turned towards me tightening his grip around me. "You are amazing, do you know that?"

"That wasn't on my list."

"Well, I just put it on there."

"Did you really?" I teased.

"Aha." He said jabbing me in the ribs, making me squirm.

"Oh no! No tickling!" I warned.

"Oh? Why's that then?"

_Yep I asked for it really didn't I?_

"No! Stop! That wasn't on my like list!" I pleaded, panting for all the wrong reasons.

"Say it!" He pinned me down with one hand holding my wrists together while he moved to straddle on top of me, poking a finger in my ribs.

"No! I won't" I wriggled unsuccessfully.

"Say It!" He pushed again.

"Never!" I raised my head and blew cold air onto his genital area.

"What the fuck are you trying to do?" He sniggered.

"Watch and see?!" I blew again, long and slow.

"Oh No! Stop that!" He felt it working. "Jen!"

He got in another jab making me scream. So I blew again.

"Stop it!"

"Make me!" I dealt him another long cold blow hoping it would make him want to pee, so he'd have to set me free.

"OK I will!" With that he kissed me hard keeping me in hold. His free hand cupped my left breast, letting his finger tips tease my hardened nipple. My body relaxed, completely drugged by his touch. He shifted position and pushed my thighs apart using his knees. I could feel his now hardened length teasing my sex. Suddenly I didn't want to be free. I liked being restrained, in this situation anyway.

"You want more?" He breathed breaking our kiss.

"Aha!" I tried pushing up against him as he nuzzled my neck.

"Louder." He groaned.

"Yeahh." I whined.

His mouth moved down over my chest and began sucking on the other nipple, being sure not to leave it out.

"Ah shit!" I arched up.

His free hand fell south and began exploring my entrance.

"You like me holding you still don't you?" He spoke against my skin.

_Yep! I think I did._

"Please?" I begged.

"I think I may have to bring something to secure you there next time. So I can use both my hands."

"Fuck! Please!" I panted, writhing around to stimulate myself on something, anything.

Sliding a finger inside, he chuckled sexily. "You do like it don't you?"

I nodded ."Aha!"

He curled up his fingers and I whined loudly.

_Oh he was just loving this. Now I was the putty in his hands, or should I say fingers._

"Good girl." He grinned and released me to lean over to my bedside table for a condom. He rolled it on quickly and retook his position, pulling up my right knee to gain better depth he pushed himself inside.

"You are one sexy lady Jen Austen." He growled low and deep. My eyes closed and I entered the darkness off my pleasure. The rhythm increased as did my blood pressure. I grabbed his face and brought him in closer kissing him hard. He pulled away as I moved my hungry kisses around his neck, coming to rest on his earlobe. Sucking it in, I heard him groan. Bringing my teeth into play I nibbled on it. My hands began clawing at his muscular back wanting, needing him, clawing him closer.

"My god woman, you are hot! Your body is delicious." I was unraveling fast with his words. He licked a finger and ran it over my hard nipples rolling it between finger and thumb. With the pace now fast, he threw back his head and groaned loudly filling me, his throbbing topped me over my edge and I shook with the electric shocks that surged through my body. He collapsed onto me, spent and breathless.

"Shit!" He gasped. "I think I need to give up smoking!"

.

"I'm going to get a coffee, want one?" I said after we'd recovered and held each other for a while.

"Please." He stretched out again allowing me slide out of bed. Wrapping my robe around me I pattered downstairs and to the kitchen. I had to giggle when I saw all my paperwork and script strewn about the floor. I picked them up and put them back on the counter, thankfully the script was stapled together, otherwise I'd be handing it to Marcus to sort into order again.

I grabbed two cups from the cupboard and stuck one under the Tassimo machine. Lazy coffee I called it. A pair of arms appeared around me and a mouth began to nuzzle my neck. "Thank you." He said softly between kisses.

I raised my right hand and placed it against his stubbly cheek, inhaling his musky scent. "You are more than welcome." My left hand wandered round my back to my left and I felt his warm skin pressed against me. "There seems to be a naked musician in my kitchen."

He giggled and continued kissing my neck. "...and exactly what are you going to do about it?" His soft voice combined with his kisses were just getting too much again.

"I think.." I began, but the words faded as I tilted my head away from his mouth, elongating my neck to make room for more kisses.

"Hmm? Think what?" He probed me for an answer.

Slowly I turned, still encircled in his hold. "I think.." I said securing my arms around his neck. "..I'll pass on coffee!"

His eager mouth found mine once more and he swept me off my feet again, heading back up to the bedroom.

.

.

A call from Trent later that day changed both our lives completely with one conversation and it wasn't the way I wanted it to go either.

"So what did the manager what?" Marcus asked once I'd hung up, biting on a rectangle of toast.

"Argh. He's throwing a hissy fit, something about the premiere venue and inadequate security yadda yadda yadda" I flapped my hand in a mocking gesture.

"Does he know about us?" His question caught me unawares.

"No, not yet. I think he'd blow a valve if he had that on his conscience too at the moment." I huffed.

"He will find out soon enough though." He shrugged matter of factly.

"Well, yes I know that but I think we need to chat about us a bit more first."

"Uh oh! That doesn't sound good." He sat up straighter on his stool that he sat on up to the breakfast bar.

I needed to sort this in my mind. I stood up from the sofa and walked to his side.

_Where were we going from here?_

"Look. You know how much I enjoy your company and I really like you, right?" I started. He scowled and threw down his toast onto his plate.

"Don't you dare. Don't give up on me! If this is the it's not you it's me shit, then I don't wanna hear it." His head moved slowly from side to side.

"Marcus, please? I just don't know what to do. How are _we_ going to work?"

"Don't! Don't you dare!" His voice grew stronger.

"You know I have to go back to New York Marcus." I tried using my softer tone, but judging by his expression the effect wasn't helping.

"I know you said you did, but not now, right?" The hurt started to show in his eyes. I couldn't hurt him. I wouldn't. This is exactly what I was afraid of.

"I fly back on the 29th Marcus." I hoped saying it slower it somehow would soften the blow. I was wrong about that too.

"That's.." He looked in his lap working out the days. "..that's in two weeks!" He bellowed.

"That's why I'm telling you now!" My voice raised slightly too.

"Well how long will you be there?"

"I don't know when I'll be back, this is my point. Filming starts in October and.."

"Wait!" He stood up from his stool and held up his hands. "You aren't coming home after the premiere are you?"

_Bingo! He'd worked it out._

I felt the tears start to sting my eyes.

"It's not worth.." I began before he cut me off again.

"No Jen! It's me that's not worth coming home for, is it?"

"No! I..I didn't say that! Please Marcus?" I needed to make him listen.

"Then what's not worth coming home for Jen? Huh? Cos' I thought we had something here? We just had the two most incredible nights of my life and you just up, leave and not bother coming back?" He gestured his hand back and forth between us.

He was hurt I know he was, and I started to feel his pain now too as the tears spilled over out in my eyes and down my face.

"We did and we do have something Marcus, Look if I can make this work; I'll do anything, but my job requires me to be in America, you know that!"

"Well how long will your scenes take to film? Couple of months?" He held out his hands in question.

I didn't answer. I didn't want him to go, to storm out, and I knew he would when he found out. Instead I looked to the floor like I was hoping it would answer for me.

Growing impatient he repeated his question. "Jen? how long?"

"They can take anywhere up to six months." I said quietly.

"Six months!" He boomed. Making me jump. "So that's it, is it? We're done? Thanks for the nice time. Maybe we will catch up in six months when I figure its worth coming home again?!" I could see tears in his eyes now too. I'd done what I swore I'd never do. I'd hurt him.

Of course I didn't want it to end. "NO! Marcus, I know.."

"No Jen, clearly you _don't_ know!" He turned around and picked up his shirt to leave.

"Marcus. Please don't go, I'm sorry.." I wailed.

"Save it!" He spat, spinning around to face me again. "You gave up on me without even asking what I wanted, without even thinking what I was prepared to give up for you and you know Jen...that's what hurts like hell!"

That was that. He'd fled. With a slam of my door I'd lost him. I was alone again, just me and my stupid career and once again I blubbered curled up on my sofa. Ignoring everyone and everything for four days.

.

.

My phone sang out for the 44th time that day. Tasha knew something was up, I never ignored her when she rang me. Too tired to fight anymore I picked it up and finally took her call.

"Jen? What's happened?" She cut to the chase.

"Nothing." I put on my best 'I'm fine' voice.

"You don't fool me Jen Austen. I've been ringing all day!" She was right I couldn't fool her, she wasn't my best friend for no reason.

"I must have knocked it on silent."

"Bullshit! I can hear it in your voice. Have you had a fight with Marcus?"

"No!" I lied.

"Jen?!" She tried once more.

"Look I have to go, I have lines to learn."

"You promise you're OK?"

"Yes. I'm fine. Speak to you Friday."

"OK, but ring me if you need me! You swear?!"

Of course I wouldn't. I had to get through this alone somehow. This one was a doosy and totally all my own fault.

"Bye Tash." I replied and hung up.

.

This was so hard. Days turned into nights and nights turned into days, I couldn't eat, drink or sleep. I stared at my lines, praying they would just soak up into my frazzled brain somehow. I repeatedly told myself over and over again to snap out of it, this was my job. I had to learn it, it was important.

Several times I typed out a text message to Marcus, and several times I deleted it. I should never have started something I knew I couldn't finish.

_This was completely and utterly my fault. I now had to deal with the consequences.  
><em>

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><p><strong>AN: Nooooooooooooooooooo! It all went wrong. She didn't explain that one properly did she? Silly Girl!**

**Thanks for my beta's ongoing support. Love and big snuggles. xx**

**Onwards then? You don't want more do you? *cups ear* Oh you do? Cool! cos I have more written!**

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	17. Chapter 17 - Return

**Chapter 17 - Return**

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><p>The only way I could think to get my mind off of Marcus was to get back to New York as soon as possible. I spoke to Trent and we arranged to bring forward my flight by a week. He was suspicious, but went with it anyway. Tasha wasn't happy, but she bought my story about a meeting I had to go back early for, which made it easier for me. She also swallowed the story about cooling it off with Marcus, or so she lead me to believe anyway. She'd would come with me to see me off at the airport. At least then I would have someone to hug goodbye.<p>

I also went to visit my mother before I left, she was the only one I felt I could tell the truth. She was very sympathetic and didn't judge me. She sat and listened while I poured out my heart, but in the end she agreed it was the right thing to do. Keeping him hanging on, waiting for me to come back was just cruel. Six months was a long time to be apart. It wasn't as if he could travel with me, he had his career here in London. He couldn't just drop it for half a year and it didn't want him to. That wasn't fair. So even though it hurt like hell. I knew it was probably for the best.

The 22nd thankfully came by quickly. I pulled my case out to my door and Steve carried it to the car. Picking up my travel bag I wheeled it out taking a last look inside. Punching my code into the alarm system I pulled my door shut. With a sigh I walked to the car and slid in. Steve closed my door and climbed in the front. I was leaving my home behind again. Hopefully alongside painful but yet wonderful memories of my time with Marcus. It was time for me to go back to work.

We picked Tasha up on the way, her goodbyes were the worst. It hurt leaving her here in London.

"Ready?" She said as we arrived at Heathrow.

"Yep!" I sighed, faking another smile.

"Oh no! The tears have started already!" She dabbed the corner of her eyes with a finger.

"Come on." I squeezed her hand. "Let's save it for the departure gate at least." I think I was fresh out of tears by now.

Rescheduling my flight meant we'd fooled the press, making sneaking through to VIP departures easy. I handed over my documents and my suitcase and we sat together waiting to be called. Management hired me a private jet. Making my flight less stressful.

"I know what's happened Jen." Tasha said surprising me a little.

"What?"

"I know why you are flying back early." She said with a small supportive smile.

"You do?" I winced.

"I'm not stupid Jen, I'm your best friend. Of course I know."

An airport worker called me forward. We both stood up together.

"I'll call you." I said pulling her in close. "I'm fine, I promise, I love you Tash."

She squeezed me tight. "I love you too." as she pulled away she looked me in the eyes. "I'll always be here for you. OK?"

"I know." I gave her a weak smile.

"Just call if you need me and I'll come running."

I knew that too. "Bye."

"See you in three weeks." She rubbed my arm in support and a tear trickled down her cheek.

I picked up the handle of my flight case and stepped forward to the gate. I didn't look back. Her whimpering was enough to crack my heart. "This way Ms Austen." The lady smiled and I followed her out to the waiting plane. I picked up my case stowed it away above my head. Settling into my seat I exhaled a big breath, suddenly craving something I hadn't all week. A cigarette.

As the aircraft left the ground I stared out my window silently saying goodbye. To everyone, to no one and when the white fluffy clouds obscured my view I closed my eyes, hopefully I could sleep the whole flight. I was suddenly tired. So very tired.

.

"Ms Austen?" A female member of the flight crew touched my arm rousing me from my sleep.

"Hmm?" I said opening my eyes.

"We're on approach to land." She smiled. Wow! I had slept the whole way. I could get used to flights like that.

"Oh? Thank you." I returned a smile adjusting my position in the seat.

"No problem." She said quietly and turned to walk to the front to seat herself. Moments later I heard familiar words.

**'cabin and crew seated for landing'**

We landed at JFK exactly six minutes ahead of schedule. I thanked the crew once more and descended the steps with my flight case. Trent met me inside the VIP arrivals suite and greeted me with a hug. "Good flight?"

"Yeah! I slept the whole way." I tittered handing my documents to the staff member wearing a high viz jacket.

"So, are you going to tell me now why you have flown back a week early?" He gave me a disproving look.

"It's complicated Trent."

"Well I've seen nothing in the press or online, so I gather you have been behaving yourself?" He tutted.

"Like I said. It's complicated." I repeated.

"OK, well I've sorted security." He handed me a bottle of water to rehydrate from the flight, which I opened and sipped, making a face. I still hated water. "Once we have your case we'll go through. There are a few people here, but not many. Press have been tipped off though so there maybe a few there too. Then it's out to the car OK?"

I nodded, clear on my briefing. My case was wheeled through to me which Trent grabbed. He did come in handy sometimes.

I put on my best smiley face and we made our way through to the arrivals building. Cameras began to flash and I smiled and waved. I noticed a tiny woman at the front of the barrier being crushed forward by the press leaning in to get their good picture. "Hey guys! Be careful!" I scowled. I approached her and pushed back some of the cameras that were shoved into my face.

"Thanks!" She puffed. "They were crushing me."

"Yes I saw!" I turned to them again. "Think about other human beings guys, not just your scoop. It's only me. This lady nearly got hurt. Think guys!"

Security was now by my side and trying to guide me away. I turned to the guy pulling on my arm. "Wait!" I snapped. "We need to go Ms Austen." He said releasing my arm.

"Help that lady first! That's what you are paid for." I pointed to the woman who was being squished again but the press guys.

"You heard her!" Trent snapped at security this time.

Two members of security reached in and lifted her over the barrier, clear of the ruckus.

"You OK?" I asked her.

"Yes. Thank you Ms Austen. I only wanted an autograph. It's very kind of you to help me out." She looked a bit flushed so I handed her my water bottle. "Here, drink some water." I flashed a look to Trent who read my mind. He beckoned over a member of staff and asked for her to be checked by first aid by my request.

"Is this what you want me to sign?" I smiled softly at the small book she was holding.

"Uh, yeah!" She handed it to me "Please?"

"Who shall I pen it too?"

"Alice please." She beamed.

I scribbled a small note and handed it back to her as the airport first aider appeared. "Take care Alice." I gave her a quick hug and we moved off.

I turned to Trent as we marched and said "Make sure she's OK Trent."

"I will." He nodded.

"Oh and get her two tickets for the premiere."

"What?" He said confused.

"Trent what do I pay _you_ for? Get her details to give her tickets to the premiere!"

"OK! OK! A pair of tickets." He repeated.

"My special guests." I said smiling. Today was gonna be a great day, I could feel it.

.

I didn't think it would, but I was wrong. It did feel good to be back in my New York house. It distanced myself from home nicely. I kind of felt like two people, at home I felt a more relaxed Jen. Able to walk down the street without many stares or comments, but New York was workaholic Jen. Always busy always going places. More rewarding.

Arriving home I parked my case by the stairs and walked through to my lounge, threw down my flight bag and kicked off my shoes. Flopping into my chair I turfed through my handbag for my phone to text Tasha and my mother to let them know I was home safe. Being hours behind it would still be late there. So I just text:

**Home safe! Catch up soon. See in three weeks J x**

That applied to them both. She had been thrilled with her ticket to the premiere for her birthday that I gave her last week. She loved visiting America.

My lovely housekeeper here looked after my house well. Feeling hungry I padded through to the kitchen. It made all the difference coming home to a fully stocked fridge. I grabbed a snack, a glass of red and I smoked a cigarette.

Now, I don't know whether the combination of the three were a factor, but running my thumb over the 'Trenchcoat' logo on my lighter suddenly made me feel ill. Drinking this early was clearly a mistake. My body clock got confused and I felt tired very quickly. Throwing the third glass of it down the sink. I headed for my king size bed to sleep off my sudden bout of jet lag.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So she's headed back to New York, leaving Marcus behind. Working Jen has returned. A stars life is never easy. **

**Big Squidgy booby hugs to Twihard till I die xx My beautiful Beta. I love ya Hunny pie xx**

**Lead on... straight through to chapter 18 xx**

**DeathToBeReborn xxx**


	18. Chapter 18 - Itinerary

**Chapter 18 - Itinerary.**

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><p>I spent most of my extra week learning my lines, being in a major leading role meant more lines and being a cop movie there were lots of technical jargon to get to grips with also. I tried my best to feel the character. I even watched some cop movies to try to get a feel of how I should stand, how to hold my body. I'm not ashamed to say I even practiced some moves in front of the mirror.<p>

Yeah! I could do this.

"What do you say Sherman, huh? You willing to push that button?" I rehearsed.

"Put your god damn hands up asshole! I may be female, but the bullet still hurts like hell when it's shot in your dick!"

"Tyler, that's them, put your fucking foot down!"

Yeah! I was a natural.

I had management meeting on Tuesday. That was as boring as ever. Things were ironed out and Trent went over some things I had lined up the week after.

The radio interview for Gel107FM was pretty cool. Both Tim and I attended and we got to talk about 'Vegas' for an hour. We did a phone-in and spoke to a few fans. I really got on well with Tim; I'd made a really great friend. The fact he was hot was by the by. We flirted constantly; I liked it made me still feel wanted somehow.

My second week back was busier than the last.

Monday 30th - I had an interview on a talk show called Saturday night with John Fernandez. It was pre-recorded, so the interview was filmed in the daytime even though it aired in the evening. That went well. We chatted about Vegas and my trip home to the UK and Tasha, although I didn't name her of course. That was her privacy right. I joined in on a showbiz game they played every week on there and failed miserably, saying that I had so much fun.

Tuesday 1st - I had a hairdressers and spray tan appointment in the morning and a meeting at Warner films in the afternoon. That went really well. I met my new producer and director and some of the crew. I ironed out a few more details I wasn't sure about. All in all I was excited about the new movie; even some of my lines were sticking in my brain now, this I held as a good sign.

Wednesday 2nd - Was my day off. I spent most of my going over my lines, developing my accent and death stare. If only mirrors could talk. That evening I relaxed in front the telly watching trashy movies and cried through a whole box of tissues. I was such a sap!

Thursday 3rd - Was a very exciting day. We had a preliminary meet up of the cast members. I got to chat to everyone and we actually all got on really well. Michael Brandon was a really great guy, and we hit it off straight away. I'd seen some of his work, but as was usually the case he was very different in real life. He wasn't as attractive as Tim, but could still turn heads. I was an extremely lucky girl, id been very lucky with co stars so far in my career. I loved show business. We all had lunch out at a swish hotel paid for by Warner. The food was lavish and the portions small. Typical posh nosh. We all had a giggle and I knew I'd make some great friends during this movie too.

Friday 4th - Was pretty much an anti climax. I had a meeting with Trent. He came over and we sorted some paperwork and contracts, undoubtedly the most boring but necessary aspect of show business. We dotted I's and crossed T's. Yawn!

Saturday 5th - I went shopping. Good old retail therapy. I bought some new clothes; mine were beginning to look tired. I somehow had lost weight again to things were starting to look baggy and trampish. I got some lovely dresses from Gucci and several sets of two pieces from Grandeur. Dior was the place I updated my fragrance collection. I needed a new smell for each new movie, I made it a rule. Shopping warmed every girl's heart whoever you were.

Sunday 6th - I had another chat show interview. This one was live. Much more fun then pre-recorded ones. The Len Barnes show was one of the top U.S chat show hosts. We talked about much of the same. But the fact things weren't edited was great. We got to drink alcohol and talk filth. They didn't even edit out my naked ass in the clip of 'Vegas' they showed. That led to a game of 'spot the boot!', where they showed famous actors/actresses ass pictures and we had to guess who's they were. I'm pleased to say I won that game. I can spot a famous ass a mile off.

The next week was quieter. But it was also the week I found out my mother was taken poorly. On the 8th she had come down with a bad case of food poisoning. She eaten some dodgy chicken or something and it hit her hard. I felt guilty of course because I wasn't in England, not that I could have prevented it of course even then. She had a short hospital stay, but Tasha was there to look after her when she was released.

Unfortunately for my mother, that meant she wasn't well enough to travel to the premiere. We were both gutted, but she insisted I have a good time and she would see the film another time. This was the worst thing about the business. I felt a million miles away rather than a few thousand. Not only a different time zone, a whole different planet. Tasha was still coming though with Sam and they'd arranged a home nurse on call if she was still poorly by the time Tasha flew out. My friend deserved medals. This would also be Sam's first trip on a private flight, let alone one to America. Tasha said he was really excited too. I just knew he'd love the U.S.

The 13th I flew to Florida, ready for my big night. I booked in at The Four Seasons. It was near the Theatre, so the transfer would be easy. Tasha and Sam would meet me here.

Fortunately by the 14th Mum was feeling a lot better so the nurse wasn't needed, but was still technically unfit to travel. Doctors wouldn't allow her fit to fly. As much as I wanted Mum there, I knew I couldn't risk her health. There was some T.V. coverage in England, so she promised to watch. I'd make her proud.

So when Tasha and Sam left her to jet out for the premiere she was recovering well. She promised to eat, seeing as her illness made her lose a lot of weight. It pained me to be stuck here, knowing what she'd been through. Mum as always told me not to worry, there was nothing I could do there and to enjoy my special night. I only hoped I could.

Knowing my best friend was on her way to me gave me some joy. I loved her happiness around me; this time would be a bit different than her last visit though. This one would be a celebration of my work that I loved to do. Bringing Sam with her would also mean I would feel like a proverbial prune. He was lovely don't get me wrong, but I knew I'd feel uncomfortable when they would be drooling over one another.

It wouldn't be their fault of cause. Her happiness was great. I just knew I would be thinking of Marcus and what could have been, if I had only kept my mouth shut that stupid day.

Hindsight was a valuable thing.

Just before Tasha was called for boarding the private jet I'd sent out to get them, she rang me from Heathrow.

"Hey Babes!" She sang.

"Hiya! How's it going? Any delays?"

"Nah! On time. We're boarding soon. I'm so excited!"

I could tell.

"OK Babe, hope you've got everything?!"

"Yes I packed and unpacked four times, Sam thinks I'm crazy!" she giggled.

"She is.." I heard Sam say in the background, which made me giggle too.

"My car will be there to get you at the airport; you remember what Steve looks like don't you?"

"Yep! How could I forget?" She already told me he was handsome when she'd stayed before.

"He will stand with your name on a board. Don't go strolling off with just anyone!" I told her sternly.

"Yes I know!" she sighed.

"It will say Jensam Barrett. J.E.N.S.A.M. on the card, Got that?" Her security at the airport without me there was important to me. I wanted to get her through there as quickly as possible with no fuss.

"Yes Jensam, I got it. Look we are being called, I have to go."

"Come on you idiot, we need to go!" I heard Sam whine.

"Sorry Babes we are walking to the plane now, Sam's being a dick!"

"OK. No fighting, we don't want a row!" I said a little louder hearing the dull roar of the engines in the background.

"He won't, if he knows what's good for him. See you soon Babes!"

"OK Tash, safe journey, see you at the hotel. Byeee."

Yep! She was mental, but I loved her. She would be here in a few hours, and then this party could get started, at last!

* * *

><p>.<p>

**A/N: Guess we've all practiced things in front the mirror then? Ahem! Swiftly moving on...**

**Thank You to Twihard tillI die for being a wonderful Beta. All the mistakes are hers! lol xx Mwah! **

**Love and Booby cuddles **

**DeathToBeReborn. xx**


	19. Chapter 19 - Premiere

**Chapter 19 - Premiere**

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><p>Tasha and I pampered ourselves in and around Florida the next day. We went to a really nice spa and had top to toe treatments. Seaweed wraps, massage, Mani and pedi, nails and we waxed. We laughed, cried and screamed through our wonderful day together. Sam wisely stayed back at the hotel we were staying at.<p>

"You girls have fun?" Sam said when we arrived back at The Four Seasons.

"Oh wow! Did we just!" She greeted him with a big wet kiss.

Yuck!

"Thank you Jen, that was just fantastic." She hugged me tight too.

"Aw, you are welcome Babes. What you been up to today then Sam?" I asked him, pulling away his attention from the television.

"Well I am just hooked on these American reality shows on Fox!" He exclaimed.

"They are hilarious aren't they?" I tittered. "Oh, and so as not to leave you out Sam, I've arranged a barber for you this afternoon, he'll be here about five o clock."

"Here? Oh wow! I get a celeb barber too!" His voice raised an octave.

"Well you could have come with us and had a back, sack and crack?" Tasha teased him popping a grape into her mouth from my complimentry fruit basket.

"Hell no!" He winced, making us all giggle.

By the time the evening came round nerves set in for us all. Tasha looked stunning in her beaded silk black dress and heels and Sam could have easily passed as a film star himself as he donned his tux. He looked hot!

They had gone on ahead in my car, and I awaited my limo as I had the red carpet to do.

Smoking helped my nerves and I stubbed out my second cigarette when I heard a soft knock on my room door. Tossing in a polo mint I checked my hair in the mirror and re-applied my lipstick. Smoothing down my figure hugging emerald Gucci dress I was ready.

"Go make um proud!" I heard myself say to my reflection. Grabbing my matching clutch I took a deep breath and opened my door, pulling it closed behind me we made our way down to my waiting limo.

Steve greeted me with smiles. "Hello! I didn't expect you tonight Steve?" I said as he opened my door.

"They asked and I said I'd love to Ma'am." He took my hand and led me to the open door.

"Steve, I've told you before, it's Jen or Ms Austen. I'm not the Queen." I joked with him.

"You are tonight Ma'am!" He said bowing slightly.

Was I blushing with my driver?

"Oh, well thank you kind Sir." I bowed slightly too.

"You're welcome Ms Austen, and forgive me for saying so but you look stunning tonight." It was the most I'd ever heard him say.

"Oh?! Thank you." I blushed again. The limo looked great; it was polished so much I could see my reflection in it. I slid in delicately making sure not to crease my dress.

.

We snailed along in the queue for arrivals.

Hurry up! I need to pee! I thought to myself.

Why did this take so long?

Finally we reached the front; it was my turn to step out onto the red carpet.

Steve got out and walked round to my door ready for my signal that I was ready. I took a few deep breaths, begging myself to calm down, and then I tapped on the window four times. Steve opened my door and immediately the cameras and shouts began.

Steve held out his hand to help me out the car as ladylike as possible. The screams were deafening. I smiled broadly showing off my teeth and waved delicately.

This is what show business was about for me. This is why I did what I did. This was the best feeling in the world ever. Fans screaming for your attention, press crammed against barriers for a great picture and quote. T.V presenters with microphones eager to shove it in your face to speak to you. I loved my job.

A huge security guard approached me. "OK Ms Austen, walk down the line then cross over to go back up the other side. No stopping."

I nodded.

As if I didn't know how this worked.

"Jennifer!" They called.

"Jenny! Here Jenny!"

"Jennifer!"

"Hi!" I said starting at the beginning of the line. I scribbled my celeb signature as I went along.

Someone jabbed a pen at me and drew on the back of my hand by mistake. "Oh Shit! I'm so sorry! I got pushed!" She apologized.  
>I just laughed. "Hey! No, that's OK! No pushing guys please?" I took the pen and scribbled on her pad. "There you go!"<p>

"Thank you!" She said pleased as punch.

I carried along the line. Smiling and adding the occasional "Hi!" And "Thanks for coming!" I crossed over and went up the other side too. "How are you? Thanks for coming!" As I went.

Signings done I joined the other gathered cast members for photos. We had group shots, then couples. Tim smelt amazing, and rested his hand in the curve of my back just above my ass, making me shiver. He bent to whisper in my ear. "You look hot!"

I whispered back, "...and you smell positively edible!" Colour flushed into his cheeks as well.

He leaned in closer again and cursed in my ear. "Fuck! Stop it, or I'll get a hard on!" He made me giggle, which the Paps got a perfect picture of.

With interviews and photos done, we made our way inside. Tim walked beside me.

I spotted Tasha and Sam in the VIP box and waved to them. They were sat next to the lady I rescued from getting squashed at the airport; I was pleased Trent had done his job.

I'd have to praise him for that.

She was sat next to a young blonde man I assumed was her boyfriend. They looked very happy, I waved to them too.

Trent caught my attention as we went in."Wow! You scrub up nicely!" He winked and kissed my cheek.

"So do you, look at you!" He was dressed in a smart black suit with a bottle green velvet tie. "We co-ordinated."

"I'll sit behind you." He smiled and took his seat. "Oh Trent!" I turned to him.

"Yep?" He leaned in to me with his ear; the noise level had risen to a roar.

"Thanks for sorting that Alice lady out with tickets! I appreciate it." I pointed up to the VIP box. He followed my finger and smiled.

"That's OK! Pleasure." He beamed again.

The movie had been put together brilliantly. The crew had worked really hard and I have to say I enjoyed watching it. I didn't usually enjoy seeing myself on screen, but I loved watching Tim squirm in his chair beside me when our love scene came on. I swear I saw a lump in his crotch area. I leaned towards him and whispered. "You err...OK?"

"Shit! Is it that obvious?" He whispered back glancing down into his lap.

"Yes!" I replied and he crossed his legs awkwardly.

After it was over he leaned in again. "See, I told you, you fucked me well!"

"Well it had the desired effect on you anyway!" I tittered.

"Do you blame me with those titties in my face?" I snorted loudly immediately regretting it. Trent leaned forward and told us off.

"Behave!" He said in a loud amused whisper.

We all filed out after the movie and posed for some more pictures and signed some more stuff for competition winners and VIP's. We also did some joint interviews too. Tim behaved during them to my relief.

Suddenly I had a hankering for a cigarette. I approached Trent as he was talking to someone I didn't recognize.

He excused himself. "Yep?!" He leaned in to hear over the din.

"Are we done? I need a fag!?" I shivered in the cold night air.

Why couldn't women wear a suit? It was freezing out here.

"Um, I think so, let me check?" He wandered off and spoke to someone who's looked official wearing an ear piece. They spoke into it and looked back to Trent and nodded.

Thank god for that!

He returned. "Yes! All done! You are free to go."

"Cool, I'm going round there for a fag, away from the crowd." I pointed to the side of the building beside some Industrial sized Wheelie bins.

"Sure, I'll wait here and make sure you get your car. I have to catch up with Brian anyway."

"K!" I shivered and tentatively walked over the grass on the tips of my toes so my heels didn't sink in the mud. I walked around the side of the building away from the public, they didn't need to see me smoking in this beautiful dress.

Routing through my clutch bag I found a cigarette, but shit! No lighter!

"Shit!" I cursed aloud and a flame magically appeared in front my face. I followed the fingers, the hand, sleeve and arm and...

Shit!

It was Marcus!

* * *

><p>.<p>

**A/N: Dun Dun DUN! What the...? He's Back! (thank god!) I missed Marcus. Wonder what he wants? Why did he come? Well fear not...cos I already know. I wrote it! :o)**

**Thank you Twihard till I die, once again you test my grammar and spot my deliberate mistakes! *cheesy grin***

**onwards then...**

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


	20. Chapter 20 - Coming Out

**Chapter 20 - Coming out**

* * *

><p>"What..." I began, not believing my eyes.<p>

"You didn't really think I'd miss your premiere did you?" He blushed with a lopsided grin and shy sparkling eyes.

"But I thought..." My mouth fell agape.

Was he actually here?

Why was he here?

He motioned with his head to the lit flame, so I pulled back a long draw to light my Marlborough light. He lit his own and exhaled it into the night air.

God, why was that so hot?

I swear he was wearing Dior cologne.

"I'm sorry..." I said sadly, wanting to take back all we had said.

"What? What are you sorry for? I was the one that threw a fit and stormed out." He looked dapper in his charcoal designer suit, white shirt and lilac tie. He shoved his free hand in his trouser pocket rucking up his suit jacket.

Was it wrong to totally be imagining him stood there in the buff? Nooo. Didn't everyone?

Shaking my head to rid myself of the image I replied. "I knew all this was coming, I should never have started anything. It was unfair to you, to both of us."

He screwed up his face like he was in pain. "OK. Can I just get this out there, cos it's eating me up? You look absolutely fucking stunning in that dress!"

He quickly drew again on his cigarette.

I laughed aloud not expecting him to say that. "Why thank you? And you Mr Perdy are wearing an extremely sexy suit." I played with his collar.

Did he just hitch his breath? I think he did.

"Don't..." He pulled away slightly and looked to the floor shaking his head.

Oh. Maybe I was wrong then.

"Oh, right. Sorry." This was so hard. I just wanted to strip him naked and fuck his brains out against the metal dumpsters beside us. Had I got my hopes up? He smelt so delicious.

Why was he here then?

He shook his head again and moved uneasily from one foot to another kicking the dirt.

"Why are you here Marcus?" I sighed softly.

"To see you." He replied just as soft looking up to me.

"But you just said...I'm confused?" I winced and drew on my ciggie, stubbed it out on the wall and tossed it away.

"I meant, don't tease me. I can't...be friends...it just wouldn't work." He stuttered to get it out. "Shit! This is so hard!" He began that sorrowful wince again. "It's really hard to concentrate on talking when you are standing there looking that fuckable!" He sucked on the end of his cigarette and flicked it away before exhaling.

I chose to ignore his last statement. "You aren't talking sense Marcus. You say I'm looking hot, then say don't touch you. Then you say I'm fuckable. It should be simple, you either want me or you don't?" Taking a breath I watched as he remained silent.

I continued regardless. "So what are you doing here? If we can't be lovers and we can't be friends, what are you here for? An autograph?" I still didn't get it and I was beginning to feel irritated.

He stuck the other hand into his other pocket too. "I said I didn't want to be friends, I didn't say I didn't want to be your lover!"

Wait! What?

"Hhh" I exhaled a sharp quick breath and tears started welling in my eyes.

Was I hearing correctly?

"Pardon? Can you say that again please?"

He took a shy step forward and withdrew his right hand from his pocket and held it against my face. "I know I have nothing to give you, and this won't be at all easy, but I can't live without you Jen...I love you."

What?!

Did he just say he loved me? My hearing was definitely playing up.

I blinked to clear my vision of the salty tears stinging my eyes, letting them spill over my mascara.

Thank god it was waterproof.

"What?" I had to hear it again and I felt myself begin to shake.

Was it the cold or was it shock?

He took another step closer still, close enough to feel him against me. Taking his other hand from his pocket he placed it on my other cheek and wiped away both my tear streams with his thumbs. Tilting up my face to look me in the eye, he repeated his words.

"I said I love you."

"Marcus ...I..." I'd suddenly forgotten how to talk.

Tell him you love him too you stupid woman!

"Shh! Don't speak and please don't cry. I don't need to hear it back; I just want you to know that I love you. I have since the pre-show party. It's you Jen. It's always been you."

My knees buckled slightly, I felt weak. He whipped a strong arm around my waist and supported my weight. I opened my eyes I didn't know I'd closed. He was there smiling at me, holding me up.

Feeling the need to answer. I slowly lent in and touched my lips on his. I saw him screw up his eyes, like in pain again, so I pulled back.

He spoke softly. "Please, please don't tell me that was a goodbye kiss?"

What the...? Hell no!

I shook my head still in shock. He let out a held breath, which made me smile. He was just as nervous as me.

"I don't know how this will work, but I can't stand being away from you. I've been a mess since I walked out, the guys wanted to know why I looked so miserable. I've even turned down work. I can't concentrate; my heart aches and I don't know how to cope without you. I love you Jen Austen."

Realizing I needed to tell him I felt the same, I wanted him too, I loved him. I opened my mouth to say it back. "I..."

Marcus shook his head and slid his hand lower onto my ass. "Don't feel you have to say it. I don't care. Just gimmie a chance, I promise I won't fail you..."

It was my turn to silence him. "I love you Marcus. I don't want anything, but you! I know this has happened so fast, but I've fancied you since the moment I caught sight of you at the O2. I made myself look like such a dick, because you made me so nervous. I know it won't be easy; I'm not stupid, but I'm damn well gonna do my best to make it work. I swear."

A big grin spread across his face and he pulled me in tighter, gently squeezing my ass through my dress. The look of pure lust flickered in his eyes as he pulled hard me against his growing bulge and rubbed himself to me slightly to gain some relief.

"Wait! Not here." I placed my finger on his lips to stop him making me look like a clown at my movie premiere.

"Jen, please, I can't I...want you so bad." He ducked his head down to kiss my bare neck pushing me back against the wall.

Shit! My eyes rolled.

"Marcus!" I breathed hard as he held me still by my neck whilst he trailed small kisses over my chest. I was ready to come on the spot. His hands grappled with the layers of my skirt to get beneath it.

Think where you are Jen!

With sadness and regret I had to push him off, leaving me smiling and panting.

"There's no press around here. You smell so good! I need to feel you, are you wet?" He said moving close again and whispering into my ear.

"There are press just around the corner Marcus; I really don't want my ass pictured in the paper fucking Marcus Perdy beside a dumpster at my premiere! It's not how I promote Gucci!" I giggled as he sucked on my neck.

"Jen?" A male voice called out.

Shit! It was Trent.

"Marcus stop!" I whispered wriggling free, smoothing down my dress.

"Yes!" I called back smacking Marcus' hand off my ass.

He came into view. "Oh! I was ...just...checking you were OK?"

"Urm! Yes. I'm fine! Trent James. This is Marcus Perdy. Marcus this is my manager Trent." I gestured between them.

"Hi!" Marcus grinned and held out his hand to Trent, the same hand he had just been groping me with.

"Where have I heard that name before?" Trent knitted his eyebrows trying to recall.

"Marcus is in a British Band called Trenchcoat." I offered.

"Yes! Yes, that's it. Nice to meet you Mr Perdy." Trent flashed me a look as he shook Marcus' hand to check I was OK and not being heckled.

I smiled and nodded indicating I was fine. Our unsaid bond was impeccable.

"Please call me Marcus." Marcus beamed. "I've heard a lot about you Trent."

"Have you? I wish I could say the same?" Trent gave me a knowing look.

"I'll explain it all soon Trent. I promise." I said shyly as Marcus shoved both his hands back into his pockets.

"OK, your car is waiting by the first barrier Jen. Can I escort you there?" Trent turned and pointed towards the direction of the car.

"I can, err... I mean, I'll make sure she gets to it OK, if you want?" Marcus smiled at both me and Trent.

"Oh, if that's all right with Jen?" Trent looked at me for confirmation, offering me a way out if I needed it.

"Yes that's fine. I'll speak to you tomorrow Trent. You get off home." I said giving him a hug.

"OK, nice to meet you again Marcus. Jen, you did great this evening. Awesome job." He lightly touched my arm "Night!" He said turning and leaving.

"Night Trent."

Marcus and I exchanged looks and burst out laughing once Trent was out of earshot.

"There could have been better way for you to meet my manager." I sniggered.

"Oh well, it's done now!" He cocked out his elbow for me to take. "Can I escort you to your ridiculously expensive car Ms Austen? Before I fuck you here and now, press or no fucking press?"

"Why thank you Mr Perdy, how kind?" I bowed slightly and slipped my arm through his.

"Ready?" He grinned knowing full well this was going to be the scoop all the papers wanted.

I nodded with a smile. "Ready."

"Oh by the way." He said as we began to stroll slowly towards the car.

"What?" I replied looking around to see if any press where still milling about waiting for my departure.

"I saw you flirting with Tim Ford during the photos"

"I was not!" I flashed him a looked, but I could see he was teasing.

"Hmm." He hummed.

"He said I looked nice and I thanked him." I said truthfully.

"Well!" He said grinning, flashing his teeth. "He can flirt all he likes, cos I'm the one who will be making you scream my name tonight." We were now in full view of the remaining guests and press so he knew I couldn't react.

"You bet your ass I will be." I said through my smile as cameras flashed in the darkness as we walked.

He chuckled at my response.

"Looks like she's with someone." I heard someone say as we approached the limo.

"Hey, who's he?" Another voice said.

I didn't want to hide him no more, I loved him and he loved me. This was exactly what I wanted.

Some press surged forward to be met by the huge security team. Marcus' hand instinctively slipped around my waist to keep me safe. I shot him a small glance and he scowled a bit, feeling protective over me.

"Who's your gentleman friend Jen?" One of the Paps called out.

"Who are you?" They called to Marcus. He coped brilliantly and just smiled at them.

Marcus opened my limo door and held my hand to help me in. I slid inside and he scootched in beside me slamming the door shut.

"Fucking hell!" Tasha swore seeing Marcus slide in beside me. Sam flapped his hand against her arm to shut her up but looked flabbergasted.

Marcus just grinned at them shyly showing his teeth again. The limo finally pulled away. I pushed a button that brought up a blackened screen between us and Steve, my driver.

"Aren't you...?" Sam said with wide eyes and a flapping chin.

"Sam this is Marcus Perdy. Marcus this is Tasha's fiancé Sam Taylor." I introduced them.

"Shit me!" Sam tittered reaching out to shake Marcus' out-stretched hand.

"Nice to meet you Sam." Marcus said politely.

"Marcus, you've already met Tasha Barrett." I said grinning, remembering the last time he'd seen Tasha. Unconscious.

"Yes! Nice to see you again Tasha." Tasha held out her hand and Marcus kissed it gently.

"Well! I don't know what to say, Jen?" Tasha garbled.

"Wow someones actually rendered her speechless!" Chuckled Sam.

"It happens a lot!" Marcus replied then turned to face me. "That felt good." referring to the fact we were now out. He loosened his tie; I could tell he wasn't in his comfortable dress zone.

"You can take it off if you want to." I pointed to his tie.

Tasha let out a loud snort.

"Tash! Behave!" I wagged a finger at her immaturity, inwardly regretting not getting separate cars back to the hotel.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Altogether ... Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!**

**I was a no brainer. He was Jen's All along xx**

**I made Twihard till I die's day anyway, so that's good. xx Was a pleasure hun x**

**Still waiting for some reviews xx**

**DeathToBeReborn. xx**


	21. Chapter 21 - One Too Many

**Chapter 21 - One too many**

* * *

><p>The journey back to our hotel was painful for us all in different ways. Tasha drooled over Marcus, Marcus kept looking at me like he wanted to eat me. Sam was starstruck and I was constantly trying to make them all behave. We pulled up at the hotel and it suddenly struck me.<p>

_ Where Marcus was staying?_

"Wait? Which hotel you staying at? Don't you have stuff to pick up?" I said to him.

"Um, I kind of didn't have time to book one." He grinned cryptically.

We stopped and Steve got out and came round to open our doors.

"What?" I asked confused. "Didn't have time to book a hotel?"

"I came straight to the theatre from the airport." He shrugged.

"Then where is your stuff?" I said, still non the wiser.

We slid out and I thanked Steve. "That's my pleasure Ms Austen, Sir!" He bowed his head politely to Marcus and we left him to walk up the steps to the hotel.

"Oh what a nice guy!" He said looking behind him as we walked.

"Steve's great, my favourite driver." I beamed.

"You fancy him don't you?" He teased.

"No I don't!" I whisked my head round to see him giggling. "Ass!" I scoffed.

"Mmm, and a mighty fine one you have back there!" He purposely peered behind me watching my ass.

"Stop it!" I whispered making him snigger.

We planned on flying back to New York the next morning, so Marcus would be staying with me at the hotel tonight. As we returned through the room door I turned to Marcus. "You never said where your stuff is? Surely you didn't wear that suit on the plane from England! ..and why didn't you book a hotel in advance?"

"It was a last minute decision and I never said I dressed like this on the plane." He confirmed.

"That doesn't make sense either or am I turning dumb? If you didn't dress like that on the plane and you have no hotel, Then where is your stuff?"

He sighed and pulled his passport from his deep pocket, holding it aloft. "This is all I have. I have been thinking about coming for weeks, but I just couldn't make my mind up and I wasn't sure how you would react. I didn't want to spoil your premiere. It's your night." He paused, so I encouraged him along.

"..and?" I kicked off my shoes and took a glass of champagne from Tasha, who'd poured me one. "Thank you." She held one out to Marcus too, who accepted it too. "Thank you Tasha." He smiled.

He continued his explanation. "and..I rang my mum for her advice. She asked if I loved you. I said yes, she said get on a god damn plane. So I did." He sipped from his glass. "I grabbed my suit, shirt and tie from my wardrobe along with my passport and got to the airport in time to get a ticket to fly out. I got there just before the film started."

"But where are your other clothes then?" I said confused still.

"I stashed them in the gents at the airport this end." He shrugged.

"Oh my god! You are nuts!" He had literally dropped everything and flew to be with me.

He sauntered closer to me. " Mmm, I'm only nuts about you Baby!" He wrapped an arm around my waist and let it come to rest on my bum again.

"Ahem!" Tasha coughed breaking our attention, but not his hold, his hand remained firmly attached to my ass. "I'd like to propose a toast!"

"Oh Tash!" I scoffed. "Don't be silly!"

"Hush you!" She winked. "To my bestest friend in the whole wide world on her wonderful premiere this evening of Vegas or Bust. Congratulations Jen!"

"Jen!" They all said together.

Aww, how sweet?

.

We all laughed and giggled into the wee small hours. Sam and Marcus got to know each other a little better and were sat, and finally talking, about the band mostly. Sam was a fan of them. This left me and Tasha chatting together on the sofa. Tasha sat on the seat as I propped on the arm.

"Well! I didn't see that one coming!" She cooed quietly.

"No, me either, but I'm bloody glad it did." I whispered back.

How much had I drunk? I felt giggly.

"Did I hear him say he just grabbed his suit and got on a plane?"

"Yeah! Mad huh? His mum told him to come and pledge his undying love!" I smirked.

"That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard. Has he said _the_ words yet?" Tasha loved getting details from me.

"Yes, he did in fact. When I was having a sneaky ciggie out the back afterwards." I squealed a little to loudly making the boys look over.

"Geesus! Did you? I mean is this it now? Are you guys going out?" She pressed with a hiccup.

"Yep." I nodded.

"Oh my god!" She mouthed topping up my glass for the ninth time before topping up her own, draining another bottle.

"I know, I hardly believe it myself!"

"He's smoking Jen! And I don't mean cigarettes!" She slurred and let out another hiccup.

"And you are pissed again! Natasha Barrett!" I giggled.

"So are you Jennifer Perdy!" I don't know why I found that funny, but we burst out laughing. I threw back my head to laugh harder and I fell off the sofa backwards. Dress, wine, undercarriage and all! After a brief silence I snorted out, laughing again.

Marcus strolled over and took my now empty wine glass from my grip. "OK! Ms Austen! Bedtime!"

"Noooo!" I flapped my hands. "I don't wanna go bed! Let's have sex out here!"

"Yes please!" Tasha squealed with laughter.

"Come on!" Marcus said pulling me to stand by my hands, my centre of balance shifted and I toppled forwards. "Woah! OK, over you go!" Marcus said bending down lifting me into a fireman's lift and headed for the bedrooms. "Say goodnight to everyone!"

"Goodnight to everyone!" I snorted and cackled like a drunken witch.

"Room on the right!" I heard Sam call to Marcus.

"Cheers mate!" Marcus replied.

.

Plopping me down onto the bed still giggling, Marcus leaned over me with a hand each side of my shoulders with humour in his eyes.

"You are irrississtiibley bootifool." I swooned.

"And you Ms Austen, are drunk! Did you eat today?" He inquired.

"Um, I duunno!" I snorted again.

"Hmm, I would hedge a bet that you haven't."

I reached up and clasped my hands round his neck. "I love yoo." I spluttered.

"Yes. I love you too." He paused briefly. "Oh Jen! I haven't seen you for nearly a month and the night I get you alone, you get like this. I wanted to ravish you tonight." He whined but kissed me quickly.

"You still can!" I pulled him in for a longer kiss and tried to wrap my legs around his body, however my coordination wasn't playing ball. He didn't resist the kiss, but groaned deeply when he pulled away.

"But I'm wet!" I teased. How anyone could sound sexy when pissed was beyond me usually, so why did I even try?

"That's from the champagne, not sexual arousal!" His deep throaty chuckle was definitely changing that though.

"Mmm." I bit my lip knowing that usually worked.

"That's not going to work Jen." However, I could see he was buckling.

"But I want yoo to fuck me Marcoos!"

"Believe me I want to." He lowered his body against me positioned perfectly between my warm legs. I arched my back pushing against his ever growing mound.

"You wanna know wot I got under dis dress?" Raising my hands I ran them roughly through his hair messing it all up.

"Damn right I do!" He said slotting his lips in between mine and grinding his lower half into my crevice.

"I want you Marcoos." I allowed my mouth to fall open inviting his tongue inside.

"Do you?" He said wanton into my mouth.

"Aha!" I flung my arms over my head letting them rest on the sheets, this in turn forced my breasts to rise nearer to his mouth. Mentally I pleaded him to take the bait. "I'm all yours!"

"God damn you have fantastic tits!" He bent his head to gobble on my cleavage hungrily making me giggle.

"Can little Marcoos come out to play?" I said in a childlike tone.

"Believe me he wants to." His said with a mouthful of cleavage.

"I've missed yoo." I whined with a squeak.

"Fuck!" He cursed and ground his hips into me further making me gasp.

"Please?" I begged.

His face came up from my cleavage and sighed saying nothing.

"Please?" I begged again with an oscar winning porn whine.

"I can't." He pushed himself up onto his hands again.

Damn! I was losing him.

"Please?" I tried again hoping he'd buckle.

"I'm not taking advantage of you when you are not fully compus mentus Jen."

"Ohhhh!" I sulked like a spoiled child..

"Now, sit up I need to do your zip." He pulled me upright again and my head span a little.

"Oh?!" I held my forehead.

"Yes, exactly. Oh!" He zipped down the side of my dress and pulled me up to stand, or should I say stagger. The dress fell to the floor revealing I wasn't wearing any bra.

"Oh shit! No bra either! Damn you woman!" He whinged.

"You like what you see Mr Preerdy?" I slurred.

"Very much so. More than you'll ever know. Now come on, into bed." He sat me back down and laid me flat on the pillow.

"Fuck!" He cursed. "Suspenders too! Woman you are killing me tonight."

I giggled as he unclipped my stockings and slipped down my suspender belt. He delicately rolled off my stockings and pulled them off my toes.

"I love yoo Marcoos." I pawed his face suddenly feeling the room darken.

"OK sweetness. Time to get some Z's. Early flight tomorrow or should I say later?"

Why was it getting dark?

Spinning?

Marcus?

Don't go?

Where are you going?

I can't see you!

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Oh I say?! Drunk Jen gets randy?! I'm proud of Marcus though for not giving in to her, despite wanting to. Poor Marcus! **

**Thank you to my right leg. Twihard till I die. Uvvv Oooooo xx**

**Come on folks where are these reviews xx**

**DeathToBeReborn xx**


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